Helena

Tips On How To Recruit For Your Favorite Presidential Nominee

2012-01-21T11:27:00.004-07:00

I've been volunteering at the campaign office of my favorite Presidential Nominee for awhile now. It's just that I feel that this election is such a crucial election for our country and so many things are on the line. No matter who gets the Presidency, it won't be easy for us. It's gone too far downhill for that. But maybe, just maybe, our country will be able to have a chance at gaining back some ground after all that we have lost. I really don't want to live in a European Socialist State. I really like Capitalism and I love Freedom. Here are a few things I have learned since volunteering at Mitt Romney For President. If you'd like to join me, please feel free. It's fun and it's a great feeling to know that you're helping your country.

1. Maintain a calm tone and demeanor, even though people are yelling at you that you are the millionth caller for the elections, and that they are NOT going to vote for your candidate simply because you are calling. Statistics show that those calls do make a difference and in all probability, those same people yelling at you will end up voting for your candidate just because of name recognition alone.

2. If they are polite, thank them profusely!

3. If they say that they will be voting, thank them profusely, regardless of who they are voting for.

4. Scripts are there for those who are unsure. If you know that something you are doing works well, do it.

5. If they say they are undecided, ask them to give your candidate a 2nd look and give them ONE specific reason why.

6. Give them some validation as an individual for doing the right thing (especially if they switch their vote to your candidate). I tell them that the campaign loves and appreciates them for their support. People seem to appreciate that so much! I've had people tell me that they were changing their minds just because I said that. People love to matter.

7. Don't say anything if it isn't sincere. People can tell if you're for real.

8. Have a light-hearted approach to your calls. Let folks know that you enjoy talking to them. If you are calling into different states, let them know how it is in your state!

9. Be aware that time is important. Sometimes you get people who want to get in a spirited debate about politics and how the country is going to hell in a hand basket. Try to keep moving because it's your job to reach as many voters as possible in the time you have.

10. Always try to get in a mention of who you are campaigning for, even if it's only a "this call was paid for by Mitt Romney For President!"

Reflection - Things Look Brighter After Today

2011-12-22T21:28:00.002-07:00

We passed Winter Solstice today and thank goodness! The days will get a little longer from here on out! The Winter Solstice occurred early this morning, marking the first day of winter and the shortest day of the year. There is only one place I want to be during the shortest day of the year and that is in front of my fireplace in the den, watching T.V. I know, I should be out doing last minute Christmas shopping and getting those last minute deals, but it's just too cold and dark after about 5:30 p.m. But at least I don't live in Alaska, north of the Arctic Circle. For people who live there, it's dark 24-7. I'm also glad that I am off for the Christmas Break. I work about 38 hours a week at a high school as a special education para educator. So this was my first day off for a 2-week vacation!

I actually look at Winter Solstice maybe a little differently than some. I know that it is an ancient Celtic celebration and even some traditional Christmas symbols can also be traced to the ancient celebrations of Solstice. For instance, lights and candles were put out to ward off the darkness and encourage the coming of Spring during Solstice. I love the Celtic influence in Christmas celebrations. I have Scottish ancestry and very much appreciate watching the 'Celtic Women' Christmas PBS Special each year. For me, it is one of the things I look forward to every year.

Since we celebrate the birth of Jesus Christ very soon, I look at today, this most dark of days and ask myself what it was like for the world before the Savior was born. The world's inhabitants had no way to save themselves from their own sins. We are taught that nothing can dwell in the presence of God that isn't perfect. And since all of us sin, man was doomed to live outside of Heaven and dwell in their sins forever, spiritually dead. How dark was that? I'd say it couldn't get much more. How much it meant to the world when finally the Savior was born, the only one who would be able to save the world from its sins. Because of His birth, the world came out of darkness and was given hope.

"Because He came to earth, we have a perfect example to follow. As we strive to become more like Him, we will have joy and happiness in our lives and peace each day of the year. It is His example which, if followed, stirs within us more kindness and love, more respect and concern for others.
Because He came, there is meaning to our mortal existence.
Because He came, we know how to reach out to those in trouble or distress, wherever they may be.
Because He came, death has lost its sting, the grave its victory. We will live again because He came.
Because He came and paid for our sins, we have the opportunity to gain eternal life." -Thomas S. Monson, President of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

And so, Winter Solstice is a very fitting preliminary event to Christmas, reminding me of how dark the world was before Christ's birth and how much brighter the world was, after His birth. May you have a wonderful holiday and enjoy it in the ways that are special to you! Thanks for letting me share!

2011-11-27T21:57:00.000-07:00

When an old man died in the geriatric ward of a nursing home in GRASS VALLEY, CA. It was believed that he had nothing left of any value.

Later, when the nurses were going through his meager possessions, they found this poem. Its quality and content so impressed the staff that copies were made and distributed to every nurse in the hospital.

One nurse took her copy to Missouri.

The old man's sole bequest to posterity has since appeared in the Christmas edition of the News Magazine of the St. Louis Association for Mental Health. A slide presentation has also been made based on his simple, but eloquent, poem.

And this little old man, with nothing left to give to the world, is now the author of this 'anonymous' poem winging across the Internet.

Crabby Old Man...
What do you see nurses? . . ... . . What do you see?
What are you thinking . . . . . When you're looking at me?
A crabby old man . .. . . . Not very wise,
Uncertain of habit .... . . . . With faraway eyes?

Who dribbles his food . . . .. . And makes no reply.
When you say in a loud voice . . . . . 'I do wish you'd try!'
Who seems not to notice .. .. . .... . The things that you do.
And forever is losing . . . . . A sock or shoe?

Who, resisting or not . . . . . Lets you do as you will,
With bathing and feeding . .. . .. . The long day to fill?
Is that what you're thinking? . .... . . . Is that what you see?
Then open your eyes, nurse . . . .. . You're not looking at me.

I'll tell you who I am. . . . .... . As I sit here so still,
As I do at your bidding, . . . .. . As I eat at your will.
I'm a small child of Ten . .. . . .. With a father and mother,
Brothers and sisters . . .. ... .. Who love one another.

A young boy of Sixteen . . . .. With wings on his feet.
Dreaming that soon now . . . . ... A lover he'll meet.
A groom soon at Twenty . . . . .. My heart gives a leap.
Remembering, the vows . . . . . That I promised to keep.

At Twenty-Five, now . . . .... . I have young of my own.
Who need me to guide . . . . . And a secure happy home.
A man of Thirty . . . . . My young now grown fast,
Bound to each other .. . . . . With ties that should last.

At Forty, my young sons . . ... . . Have grown and are gone,
But my woman's beside me . . . . . To see I don't mourn.
At Fifty, once more, babies play 'round my knee,
Again, we know children .. . . . My loved one and me.

Dark days are upon me . . . . . My wife is now dead.
I look at the future . . . . . Shudder with dread.
For my young are all rearing . .... . . . Young of their own.
And I think of the years .. . . .. . And the love that I've known.

I'm now an old man . . . . ..... And nature is cruel.
Tis jest to make old age . . . . . Look like a fool.
The body, it crumbles . . . . . Grace and vigor, depart.
There is now a stone . . . . Where I once had a heart.

But inside this old carcass . . . . . A young guy still dwells,
And now and again . . . . . My battered heart swells.
I remember the joys . . . . . I remember the pain.
And I'm loving and living . . . ... . Life over again.

I think of the years, all too few . . . . ... Gone too fast.
And accept the stark fact . .. . . That nothing can last.
So open your eyes, people . . . ... . Open and see.
Not a crabby old man . ... . . Look closer . .. . See ME!!

Remember this poem when you next meet an older person who you might brush aside without looking at the young soul within.

We will all, one day, be there, too!
By: Jim Satnan

The Christianity Question - Part I

2011-10-22T21:02:00.015-06:00

Since we are now hot and heavy into the race for the GOP nomination it seems that once again the old (getting really old) question about whether or not members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints are real or false Christians is being scrutinized in the media.

    One reverend Jeffress decided to lay it out and tell his 10,000 member congregation and news media and those interested in the candidates competing for the Republican nomination that, among other things, Mormonism is a "theological cult", and that Americans should want a true Christian for president (i.e. Rick Perry) as opposed to a false Christian (i.e. Mitt Romney).
       I ran across an e-mail my DH wrote to a Mr. Bill Hemmer, anchor at Fox & Friends, to make the case that the LDS church is indeed and should be considered Christian. DH cited some of the criteria Jeffress used to make his claims about the invalidity of LDS Christianity: I loved it and so I am sharing his reasoning here. It makes sense to me!
     "Mormonism was invented 1800 years after Jesus Christ and the founding of Christianity..."   If you look at the three largest groups that represent Christianity throughout the world - Roman Catholic, Eastern Orthodox and Protestantism...you find the following:
Originally the Roman Catholic Church was part of the Orthodox Church. A division occurred in 1054 A.D. wherein the church was divided into east (Greek) and west branches (Latin), which later became known as the Eastern Orthodox Church (east) and the Roman Catholic Church (west). This event is known as the "Great Schism". It happened because of political, ecclesiastical and theological differences and disputes.
     Therefore, even within the origins of Christianity and the largest Christian denomination in the world, differences in doctrine split the church into entities that remain to this day. The third group mentioned, Protestantism, is a movement based on rebellion against the Roman Catholic church.
     If the three primary groups of Christianity throughout the world cannot see eye-to-eye on Christian doctrines and the interpretations thereof, and Christian practices/ordinances are not consistent between the three to this day, and if divisions within the ranks and the establishment of the major Christian denominations occurred 1054 years and 1500 yeas after the death of Jesus Christ, is it so far-fetched for another Christian religion to evolve in 1830 A.D. (Mormonism)?
     " Mormonism has a human leader vs. a divine leader, Joseph Smith..."   Yes, Joseph Smith was the founder of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons), yet his designation as a leader of the faith is no different than the Pope being the leader of the Catholic church. In both cases, a man leads the church in this capacity; to communicate the will of God to the people. In the case of the Catholic church, the pope is deemed to act in conjunction with Deity to provide instruction, counsel, interpretation, etc. to their members and to the world. So it is with the Latter-day Saint, they have prophets who speak the Word of God to their members, originating with Joseph Smith.
     Should Joseph Smith be considered any less a legitimate founder of a religion than Martin Luther and John Calvin, founders of Protestantism? Can he not be afforded the same degree of acknowledgment in that God may have chosen to speak to him, and through him, regarding His will and His doctrine?
     There were others who founded Christian religions centuries after Christ's death; King Henry VIII - Anglican Church of England (1534); John Knox - Presbyterian Church (1580) John Smith - The Baptist Church (1606); John Wesley - The Methodist Church (1774).   All of these Christian denominations were founded by a human leader. The Baptist Church, Mr. Jeffress' denomination, was not founded until 1606 A.D., 1500+ years after Christ. The "leader" of the Mormon faith is indicated in the official name of the religion, that is, "The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints." It is also interesting to note that of all the faiths mentioned, not one of them contain the name of the Savior and Redeemer of the world, Jesus Christ, in their name. If Jesus Christ is the head of any church or religion, should not the church/religion be called in his name?
____________________________________
   Those are just two of the criticisms Mr. Jeffress had. Both of these criticisms I believe to be invalid. I love the Savior, Jesus Christ. I believe that through Him is the only way to make it back to live in the presence of Heavenly Father. I love the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. It provides the teachings, ordinances and keys I need to make it back to Heaven someday. What can be more Christian than that? I will have more in an upcoming post!

My Latest Timed Mile Run

2011-10-15T11:35:00.000-06:00

I posted earlier about a really easy way to predict the kind of health you will have in your later years. All you have to do is do a mile run and look at the time you did it in. So, I thought I was in fairly great shape because I take my dog on runs, am not seriously overweight and can still do the splits. But my time earlier this summer wasn't great, that's for sure. So I vowed to do something about it. I did, until I started back to work at the high school and since then I've been absolutely horrible about keeping up my cardio. But thanks to Alice, my Alternative HS's Physical Education Teacher (and my well-respected friend), I decided to do a timed run again with her students. She has started making her own students accountable for their cardiovascular health by doing several timed runs during the school year and measuring improvement!
    Thursday morning was a crisp fall morning as we made our way out to the river trail, which is adjacent to our small school. I had made one discovery since my earlier timed run. If I stop, it's really hard to start back up again. So I promised myself I wouldn't stop, no matter what. If I was doing the old-lady two-step by the time I was through, so be it, I wasn't going to stop.
   Alice's whistle blew, and off I went, along with about 25 other students. It was so funny. Everyone blew by me. I just knew that I was going to be so humiliated and come in dead last. Oh well, this wasn't to impress anyone. I just wanted to see if I could beat my last time. Darn, now I was regretting my negligence about working out these past 3 weeks. I just kept telling myself, "don't stop, don't stop, whatever you do. You've been through childbirth, nothing can top that, you're a strong woman...."
    It wasn't long before I noticed that some of the kids were walking and that I was passing them! I also noticed that when they saw that I was passing them, they started back up. I guess it WOULD be the ultimate humiliation to have someone as old as their mom or even older, passing them up. And so we kept going. I reached the halfway point, took the candy from the lady, to prove that I had indeed reached the halfway point, and started back. I passed more winded students up, and then I saw the finish line. I had enough in me to speed up as I crossed.
When it was all said and done, I increased my original time by over a minute! I'm super excited and it did a lot for my motivation. This morning I took my dog out for a trail run/walk and enjoyed it immensely! Have a wonderful fall! You can do it too!

6 Month Re-Cap

2011-08-18T18:23:00.005-06:00

It's been over 6 months since Joseph came to our home to live full-time. What a fun-filled, hectic, perplexing, happy time it has been! He came to our home not too sure of himself, angry, depressed, low self-esteem and in danger of flunking out of 8th grade because he hadn't been attending and the truancy officers were after him and his dad. And so it was with some sense of desperation that his dad called me after all these years of my wishing he was with me, wishing I could help him, wishing that he weren't so far away. Now here was my opportunity and I seized it. While his dad was still hemming and hawwing about whether or not he should be living with me, trying to think of a way to get out of paying for him to come out, I simply got online and purchased a one-way ticket for Joseph to come. I bought the ticket without getting a final affirmative answer, without knowing whether he would be on the flight and without knowing whether I could afford it, but I knew that he needed to come immediately or his 8th grade year might not be salvageable. I provided the means. No strings attached. Thank goodness my ex thought enough of Joseph to let him come and live with his other family. The semester had already begun. Time was of the essence. He had already completely flunked out of the fall term. He needed to make some things up really quickly or else...He arrived on January 31st and started school the next day. Off to the races. I was working full-time and so I depended heavily on Greg, my husband, to pick up the slack. We have been married for over 10 years now, since Joseph was 4. Joseph knows us as the other parents--the ones he sees once, maybe twice a year if we're extremely lucky.
    Joseph was definitely thrown into very unfamiliar territory. The kids here didn't even talk like him. He had trouble understanding their lingo, since he has been living in the deep south since he was 6 years old. Where were the woods that he was used to taking off to for hours? Why was there a woman in the house? He was used to living with his Dad and only sometimes had his stepmom in the house, when she wasn't with her own kids in Utah. Why were we always bugging him with things like bedtime, shower time, wake up time, homework time, church time, family home evening, chores? The structure was like a ton of bricks on him. It was suffocating. Nevertheless, he was obedient and tried his best. He didn't miss a day of school. And at the end of the school year, in May, he had a 3.86 GPA. I literally couldn't have done it without Greg. Joseph wasn't used to the influence of a mom--me. The only thing I had been able to do for many years was to give him a once a week phone call and that had started only a few years ago. Before that, contact was very limited. He definitely related to Greg better, even though he wasn't used to the structure that Greg insisted on. Sometimes I felt so bad that he was obviously having a hard time and Greg would insist on close to perfection from him. I said, "Can't we just be happy for some progress in this area and not be so hard on him?" But Greg's answer made sense--"He doesn't have the luxury of time. He needs to learn this now. If he doesn't learn it now, it will be too late. So he needs to get it NOW." And so I tried to support what were obviously hard and painful things for Joseph to pick up. Literally, picking up his dishes and bringing them upstairs to the kitchen was and continues to be a big, difficult battle. Not spitting in the kitchen sink and other hygiene issues--rather important in civilized society-- needed to be worked on as well.
    But can I just say that when he smiles, the world smiles with him? He's got the most beautiful smile and it melts my heart. I fall in love with my son every single time he smiles. Other than that, I'm in constant self-reminder mode about how much he means to me and that I need to exercise patience and long-suffering. (Like the time he came in and with a huge smile told me that he wrecked my beloved bike, like I was supposed to give him an award...)

Things broken - fishing pole, my bike, my earphones, shower stall door, back gate...

Things lost: 2 lighters, homework assignments, his electric razor (accused me of stealing it), wallet (accused me of stealing it),back pack (we drove to SLC to get it back)...

Teasing - Evee our dog, me, the neighbor girl who rides up and down the street on her bike, girls at school....

Loud noises - constant whistling, tracking in lots of stuff from outside, loud clapping, loud singing of nonsensical songs, blowing off fireworks at odd hours, maniacal laughing for no apparent reason...

Detachment - in room, not coming out for long periods, not wanting me to disturb him, not wanting to friend me on Facebook (that's OK, I just settled for his password!), resistant to hugs :(

Bathroom - too much time in bathroom, hour long showers, face picking issues

Loves - Evee, the dog, his brother, sleeping in, fireworks, longboarding, 'Everybody Loves Raymond' re-runs (It's so funny to hear him chuckling throughout the episodes), banana pancakes, FHE, watergate salad, oatmeal chocolate chip cookies, Star Craft.

Progress: 3.86 GPA, made varsity for Provo HS as a Freshman, laughs more, talks more, is more outgoing, plays the guitar a little bit. Ordained a Teacher in his Teacher's Quorum, has stopped teasing me and the dog so much, has learned more about the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

We've been struggling in many ways to provide Joseph with a fertile environment to be able to grow and progress. Sometimes I wonder how we do it. No one has helped us at all. As a matter of fact, I have actually paid over $650 to Joseph's Dad while he has been with us. We've wondered where each month's rent will come from and still do. But if this is what needs to happen, then so be it. I love Joseph so much. I know who he was as a baby and I know his heritage and potential. And I melt when he smiles!

How Hot Do Fireworks Get?

2011-07-10T00:11:00.001-06:00

That is the question I posed today to my dear husband. He replied, "700 degrees, maybe?" That sounded incredibly hot, but I wanted to confirm it. (Not that I don't believe everything that comes out of the man's mouth, I do....) I got on my trusty Google Search Engine. I was asking because even after almost a week after the 4th, my arm is still hurting where I was hit by an errant firework at our family party. And the ugliness on my arm makes one want to avert their eyes because if you didn't know what it was, at first glance it looks like some kind of fungus or leprosy eating two holes in my skin.
Yep, it seems like I can never get through a summer without some kind of mishap, ruining my summer "look" with some kind of scar, bruise or scrap. It never fails! Last summer I sported a slow-healing red scrap on my lower leg as a result of a mishap on my bike. It just wouldn't go away. It has finally healed, but now this year I've got another nick on my calf from something (probably shaving) and now this! I don't anticipate this going away for some time. I mean, seriously, my darling nephew basically blew two holes in my arm. We're all joking around as I scrape off the black charred skin, and I'm telling him the inevitable scars will give me something to remind me of him, dear sweet Matthew! But inside, it's not quite as funny as I let on. I'm using tea tree oil like crazy, hoping it won't get infected because doctors are to be avoided if possible, since I don't like going to them! Didn't I just post about a traumatic event that happened to me one summer? This could get old!
Oh, by the way, the result of my Google Search was this:

Black powder (gunpowder) commonly used in rockets and as a burst charge in aerial shells, burns at temperatures up to 1700^oC.

Pyrotechnic stars used in rocket headers and shells, if fuelled by a metal powder such as magnesium, can easily burn at temperatures in excess of 2200^oC.

Flash powders used to make a bright flash and a loud bang, can burn at temperatures above 3000^oC.

Ummm....pretty sure that I got a burn from flash powder used to make a bright flash and loud bang since we were doing aerial fireworks that have just recently been made legal in the state of Utah! "Can burn at temperatures ABOVE 3000 degrees centigrade"? Ahh, that's why my skin turned black and there are now two holes. Got it! Baby, 700 degrees was quite a low ball figure! Just saying......

But being the quintessential optimist that I am, I am telling you that there is always a silver lining in this! For one thing, I won't be washing my own hair for awhile. My local hair salon will be seeing a lot more of me so I can get my hair washed, styled and blown out! (They give great scalp massages too!) And, I have a whole pack of cute, girly designer band-aids that are just waiting for the perfect wound. I will be injured in style! So there you go, positive thinking at its best!

I can't wait to get the girly band-aids out. That WILL be my summer look

Experimentation with Chard!

2011-07-06T20:28:00.002-06:00

If you haven't cooked with Swiss Chard, I suggest you do it this summer! It's delicious! Swiss Chard was one of the offerings I picked up on my bi-monthly fruits and veggies co-op visit! For $16.00 Bountiful Baskets fills a small laundry basket completely full of wonderful fruits and vegetables, some of which I wouldn't automatically think of purchasing at the store! I love the element of surprise when I pick up my baskets. I can then use my ~~savvy at stealing recipes from the internet~~ creativity and include it in my menus for the week. OK, usually I just cook one dish--not in conjunction with an entire meal--and call it good. Who am I kidding? It's the experimentation that is fun!
I went to the pick-up spot and noticed this huge green leafy bundle, with bright red stems. I thought it was rhubarb, but the lady told me that it was Swiss Chard.

Two baskets for each order--One basket is fruit and the other vegetables. We fill our own containers with both of these baskets.

I'm embarrassed to say I've never cooked Swiss Chard, but I've always intended to! The leaves are very thick and don't look like they would taste very good in a salad.

With a few pointers from the internet, I got started. First I cut up an onion, 2 carrots, and some garlic. I sauteed these in some bacon drippings until they were tender.

I then added some chicken broth and put in the finely chopped red stalks of the chard. I cooked these until they were tender and lastly added the leaves and cooked them until they wilted! I added some crumbled bacon, lemon juice and topped it with Parmesan cheese.

The result was amazing! I felt like a chef indeed! I absolutely love the subtle zingy taste of the chard. It would be a great addition to any Italian meal!
My next conquest is to use two huge butternut squashes in a meal! Off to the internet I go!

What Almost Happened To Me

2011-06-21T12:24:00.001-06:00

   I am impressed with people who have gone through tragic events which have left them disfigured in some way and who still manage to keep optimism and a positive outlook in life! I can somewhat identify with the prospect of being permanently disfigured because at one time I thought I would be disfigured for life!
About 8 years ago, Greg and I were invited to go on an ATV outing with some friends to Little Sahara, located in the Sevier Desert in Western Utah. I had never been on an ATV before, but was excited to learn! We spent the first night riding around the camp slowly in a group. I enjoyed doing that and looked forward to the next day of riding in a more extensive area. The scenery was stark and beautiful at the same time, with sand dunes fanning out as far as I could see! First thing in the morning, a group was rounded up to go out and I was assigned a helmet and a big monstrosity of a vehicle. I hurriedly put on the helmet, got on my ATV and took off. I was a little tentative, being that it was my first ride out of camp and the speed was definitely faster than the night before. I found myself trying to catch up with the rest of the group.   Then, they totally disappeared over a big sand dune. Not wanting to be left behind and be lost, I revved up the engine and started straight toward the large sand dune, thinking that the more speed I acquired the better chance I'd have to get over the hill. Faulty thinking on my part. Apparently, I didn't catch the steep incline right and the speed must have been waaaay too fast because I hit the rise of the dune and it lurched me forward onto the steel steering shaft. I would have been OK, if my helmet hadn't gone flying off before my face hit it. I felt a violent, sharp shooting pain and I knew that I was in trouble. I started crying and screaming in pain, and frankly, I don't know what I said or did from that time on until I was being taken in the car to the hospital and I really don't feel that I can be responsible! I know that some time after the accident a friend who was there asked me, "Did you really mean those things you said?" I told her that I did, but after considering my state of mind and my level of coherence, maybe I said some things that were uncharacteristic of myself! I just don't know....
     Suffice it to say, my nose was trashed--split wide open and pretty much shattered. I remember being looked at after arriving at the hospital in Nephi, which was 100 miles away and they just said they couldn't do anything for me. They called ahead to Provo to notify the plastic surgeon on call that I would be coming in. When I was rolled into Provo, I remember that it was Dr. Hershie, who I later found out was the premier plastic surgeon in the area. As was his custom before any operation, he said a prayer over me to bless me and him as we entered into the surgery to repair my annihilated nose. He did one other thing for me--he put 3 or 4 long Q-Tips saturated with a liquid I wasn't familiar with into the wound where my nose used to be. Pretty soon, I started feeling really, really calm, even peaceful, yes, even transcendentally happy. I asked what in the world he had given me to make me feel so wonderful when only a few minutes before I had felt so distraught and in pain. He informed me that he had just given me liquid LSD! Crikey! So that's why people get hooked on drugs! Wow! Don't get me wrong, I'd never be a junkie, but to feel like that just once, at that particular time, was a gift! And so, I got through my initial nose repair.
   I went through one more surgery and I felt that no matter how many surgeries I had, I'd always look like a freak. I wondered how I would relate to people, how I would be able to socialize, how other people would perceive me as someone with a severely disfigured face. Fortunately, Dr. Hershie worked his magic and along with a beautiful priesthood blessing I received at the hands of my home teacher wherein I was promised that no one would be able to tell I had ever been in an accident, I never had to live the life of a person with a disfigurement.
     But there are those people who do and I am so amazed and in awe of them! For instance there is a woman who many people know about and who personifies the essence of inner beauty and strength--her name is NieNie! Have you heard of her? She's pretty famous around these parts. She and her husband are plane crash survivors. She is very generous and shares her story with everyone who cares to know on her blog. She teaches us all a lot about true love, family, what really matters and beauty on the inside!
    And I found a story that touched me so much about a 12-year-old boy from the Ukraine who was in his small home when an oil heater exploded. It killed both of his parents and left him with 2nd and 3rd degree burns over 75 percent of his body. He probably should have died. But he survived. And today, he is here in the U.S. and adopted by wonderful parents and a joy to all who know him. He is so grateful. He was able to get new eyelids, a new nose and fingers from what were once his toes.
     Both of these stories are such great examples of the triumph of the human spirit. My hat goes off to them and I will continue to thank God for the many blessings I receive each and every day and try to be more service-oriented and compassionate to those around me.

Moving Rendition of National Anthem

2011-06-15T16:58:00.001-06:00

I happened to see the opening ceremony of the NBA Finals Game in Miami, FL. It piqued my interest about who was singing the National Anthem. It was Marc Anthony, commonly known as Mr. JLo, Jennifer Lopez's husband with whom she has twins! I was absolutely blown away by his singing and his stage presence. So here is a peek for you! You agree with my critique, yes?

A Venture Into Long Boarding!

2011-03-05T21:04:00.003-07:00

My son, Joseph, invited me to go on an outing with him on the local river trail. It was about 50 degrees outside, which to us was tropical weather after the cold winter we've had. So he got on his trusty longboard and I on my bike and off we went. He says he would be considered average on a longboard, certainly not a "skater" type. But I think he's really good!

   I enjoyed watching him glide along the fairly smooth trail, his hands casually shoved into his jean pockets and when there was an occasional bump, he would jump slightly with the board to get over, with as little impact on the board as possible. We went for about a mile and a half, with me just kind of coasting on the bike and not working up much of a sweat. In contrast, as we were coming back, I noticed that Joseph was definitely working up a sweat. I realized that pushing off and gaining momentum on a long board can be quite the anaerobic exercise!
   Somehow I found myself on the long board and Joseph on the bike. He was a great instructor, telling me how to push off and how to line up my feet. I found out that indeed, it takes a lot of work to push off and obtain a workable speed. Having some sense of balance is certainly key. I longed to be as good as my son and be able to glide gracefully along, looking so nonchalant, as if it were effortless. Unfortunately, my movements were rather choppy and spastic, more akin to an old-time silent picture movie, where all the actors look robotic. I would obtain a glide for all of 2 feet and find that I needed to once again push for momentum. I hadn't been doing it for even 10 minutes, and I was sweating like a pig. And darn those bumps where roots from the trees along the path extend out under the trail and break up the asphalt. Somehow you need to clear those! Joseph did so effortlessly, and when he told me to just go over them instead of getting off the board and walk across, I obediently attempted to do just that. Unfortunately, I was not as successful as Joseph. My board seemed to catch on the jagged lip of the bump and just stalled out. I, on the other hand, lurched awkwardly forward, landing in an incredibly awkward and painful position, my left leg twisted under me going one direction and my right leg going in the opposite direction. Crap! Not my bad knee, the one I have been babying along for 2 or 3 years now, after a previous, equally awkward fall on the ski slopes. It has never healed back to its original, healthy state. Now, here I was, with a re-injury and in my mind, probably more serious. I lay there on the pavement yelping and crying in misery and Joseph standing there in dismay and concern. I had the luxury of laying there to collect myself without any passers by. I would have gotten up quickly just because of embarrassment if anyone had come by! After a few minutes I got up and dusted myself off, hopped on the bike and off we went.
We stopped on the way home to say hello to some horses and when I got off the bike, my leg wouldn't support me and kept buckling under my weight. Not a good sign!
It is the day after the event and I haven't been out of my pj's all day. I didn't walk the dog and I lounged around in bed reading, after I was served breakfast in bed, which was definitely a perk of the whole unfortunate episode. Thankfully, I have one more day to recover before the work week begins. Hopefully nothing got torn and I will be back to full throttle soon!
   But what this is telling me is that my days of reckless abandonment with trying new things may be almost over. I want to keep the mobility I have and not wreck the great quality of life I enjoy. I have to think of the consequences more than the immediate gratification I might have when trying fun and exciting physical challenges. It's rather sad to come to that point and a far cry from when I got on the ski slope for the first time. (Wow, another story for another time!) I'm glad that it was with Joseph when the realization arrived. But never say never! Even now, I feel the need to prove myself. I like the board I found above! Ironically, they are called 'Old Lady Skate Boards'. I can tell you one thing, I'd rather be the old lady riding the board than the old lady ruining other people's fun, like this lady!    Stay safe! Live life to the fullest but be wise!

Goodbye February

2011-02-28T23:00:00.007-07:00

This month has been quite the month. It was bitterly cold during the first part of the month, then we had Valentine's Day, then President's Day, the Academy Awards, and now it is over. Today, it was approaching 50 degrees and the sun was out, so I hauled out my bike and took a beautiful ride on the river trail! Ah, sun..giver of life! But as with everything, moderation. Sadly, the dilemma we are always fighting. I think that this quote by Max Muller fits today and this month in general, "A flower cannot bloom without sunshine and a man cannot live without love." So as February leaves us, it is a reminder to me of two things I cannot live too long without--sunshine and love! And this February, I'm grateful that I have no shortage of either one.

I've been wanting for a long time to share some of the poems of my late maternal grandmother, Helen MacDonald Livingston. She was a wonderful woman, whom I adored as a child. Before she left us, she left behind beautiful writings. Her poetry speaks to me today more than ever. Here are two of her poems - one about sunshine and one about love!

Message Of Spring
Have you heard the song of the meadow lark?
Do list(en) to the message it brings!
With the first warm rays of the sun, hark, hark!
Hear it sing. It is spring, Oh! It's spring.
A message of spring, the meadow lark brings
It pours forth from its liquid throat,
And where 'er it rings there isn't a thing
But what responds to its joyous note.
The sun peeks out a little more to hear,
The sprouts of grass stir beneath the green,
And perhaps the spring herself loses fear
And trips out to greet the rapturous sound.
So list(en) yourself for the meadow lark's song
And list(en) to the message it brings,
And you will be filled before very long,
with the wonderful sunshine of spring!

Love's Coming (or Oscar Night 2011)

Love comes to some in crimson gown
'Neath brilliant lights of dazzeling town,
With blaring bands, and pomp and show
That she has come, she lets all know.

Love comes to some 'neath country trees.
Her step is muffled by the breeze.
I really can't say what she'd wear.
One hardly knows that she is there.

Tho' some would like the love in red,
I'd choose the quiet one instead:
The love that has quaint, quiet ways.
I think it is the love that stays...

But my, aren't these dresses beautiful?

Ice Is Nice (When You Aren't Bulldozed By It!)

2011-02-22T18:18:00.000-07:00

We've had some strange and epic weather all around the U.S. this year. Mainly record-breaking snowfall and flooding! Utah was comparatively tame in comparison. But we did have some really cold temperatures in January and the snow fell in abundance. And then this! On Wednesday, February 16th, high winds with gusts of about 50 miles per hour blowing over Utah Lake, caused the ice to blow to shore and pile up on the dike and over the moat! Within 5 minutes the ice had piled up 35 - 40 feet high! It even caused $5,000 damage to a man's vehicle that was parked where the ice was piling up. At least he got to it before it was totally destroyed. Read about it here!
Anyway, we took a little time over the President's Day weekend to go take a look for ourselves at what hasn't happened in over 25 years to this area of the lake, according to old-timers. Here's what we found! We had a lot of fun climbing around on the ice and it made for some fun shots!

Chunks of ice blown up on the dike

Cars will have to wait until summer to drive on this road

As for me, I hope we've seen the last of the cold weather. Three months of really cold weather is all I'm good for. Before too long, I'll be whining about moving to St. George during the winter!

The First Week

2011-02-10T18:40:00.001-07:00

Our first week as full-time parents to my 14-year old son has come and gone. Let me tell you there were some doozies! First of all, he eats a ton. We are not used to cooking so much food! It's a full breakfast, lunch and dinner. I am so grateful that DH has started to take cooking to the next level and really enjoys it! His cooking is so much appreciated because I leave for work at 7:30 and come home at 3:30. I am pretty tired after dealing with 6 or 7 at-risk boys at Independence HS. We had BLT's for breakfast this morning, the best fried potatoes yesterday morning and banana pancakes the morning before. It was hecka good!!!

Another thing is that Joseph has a lot of catching up to do academically. He has missed long periods of school for virtually every year of school since kindergarten. And while he is very intelligent, he doesn't understand some of the math concepts that he should have known in elementary school. So there is a lot of catch-up to do. That is another thing that DH has so unselfishly done. Every single night he has had to help Joseph with his homework and help him to understand what he isn't understanding at school. This means that first he has to understand the math himself. (Fortunately, it is only math that seems to be the thing that is giving Joseph the problems.) So first he is going over it himself to make sure he gets it and then he tries to explain it to Joseph. One night it took 3 hours to get his homework right. So while Joseph got off to a rocky start and had to be put back in math, he is now starting to turn in his homework and do well on his tests. I am optimistic that he will be able to catch up!

Apparently in Virginia, where he had been living, Joseph was used to quite a bit of freedom, taking off wherever and whenever he wanted to. He lived in a very small rural area, with lots of forest and wooded areas. He and his dog, Shadow, would go exploring a lot. This cannot happen here, because there is so much to do after school and only so much time to do it in. One day, Joseph didn't come home. After an hour, I decided to go looking for him. I was worried that he had missed the bus and had forgotten our number and had started out walking himself. I drove around and ended up at the school and patrolled the deserted halls but didn't find him. I called a couple of other boys' moms to see if they had seen him, but they hadn't. Finally, after almost two hours, he walked in the house, followed by two boys. They had gotten off at the other kid's bus stop and had gone to his house, hung out, gone to the second kid's house, hung out, and now they were at our house, ready to see what was here. So we had a little chat about that.

He is used to going to bed whenever he wants and so where it should only take him 30 minutes to complete a shower, brush his teeth and get to bed, it takes him up to an hour and a half to get it all done. We have to stay on top of him constantly to keep him focused and on time.
I honestly have to say, I couldn't do it if I didn't have DH helping and participating - fully committed and engaged to what we are focusing on: helping Joseph to succeed this year in school. But having him here is so wonderful. He brings such a great spirit to our home. He is so funny. He is so fresh. He wants to accomplish things but he needs our loving help and support. In turn, we need his sweet ways and innocent sense of adventure. He just loves our dog, Evee. It gives us a new sense of purpose. I am just tickled pink. I only hope that it can continue on, but I'm not sure. It will be mostly up to him if he chooses to stay. Maybe this routine is too structured for him. He has been left to do virtually everything on his own his whole life--with no routine, no discipline (except by his older brother--Yikes!), and no stability (always moving around). I hope that he will like it here and realize that what he can get here is stability, routine, discipline and encouragement. So far, so good!

A 6 Foot 200 Pound Miracle

2011-01-31T22:24:00.002-07:00

Sometimes things that you have hoped and prayed for, and finally accepted that thing as a 'no' answer, happen. And they happen suddenly. So suddenly, in fact, that you wonder whether or not you are dreaming, or, strangely, if you are even up to the blessing that you were asking for in the first place.

Let it suffice to say that my son, Joseph, separated from me at 19 months of age, and who I have dreamed, longed for, cried and prayed would one day be reunited with me for longer than 5 weeks once a year, came from Virginia to live with us to finish out his school year. He came this last Saturday and enrolled in school today. I've known that he would be here for all of one week now. It is no less a miracle than turning water into wine as far as I'm concerned.

He has a lot of things he needs to get caught up on, a lot of things he doesn't know, some things that need to be unlearned. But there are a lot of things he knows, too. I know what a special boy he is. Yes, he just turned 14--rather late in the game for a mother's influence to be felt at it's most significant. But, nonetheless, I think I'm up for it! And I know he is too! So here's to the school year! Wish us luck! I haven't been a full-time mom in quite awhile now!

First day of School

Unpacking and getting his room organized

Viktoriya, My Teacher, My Friend, Last Chapter

2011-01-29T21:17:00.004-07:00

It has been a sad and difficult time for the friends and family of Viktoriya Shershnova. Seeing her suffer in the way that she did the last 20 months after her horrific car crash was more tortuous for her loved ones than for her. She went from being a vivacious, vibrant, loving mom and famous personality to a shadow of what she was, totally dependent upon the mercies of hopefully kind caretakers at the care facility at which she stayed.

I felt so fortunate to have been able to visit her on a regular basis during a portion of that time. It was a privilege to be able to put her favorite lotion on her arms and legs and put chapstick on her parched lips. She was able to pay attention and communicate a little bit. She loved her face rubbed and her hands rubbed. She would get a sweet peaceful little smile on her face when she was well enough to enjoy it. But she was in lots of discomfort and often communicated that as well by her looks of sadness and pain.

I remember the Christmas of 2009 when I scheduled my singing group, 'Friends And Neighbors', to go and perform their annual Christmas Performance at her care facility. I had it put on the facility event calender and reserved the main hall and called ahead the day before we came to make sure that Viktoriya was able to be in attendance. Despite all of that, the day we arrived, they weren't going to bring her out to see the performance because she wasn't ready and they said she didn't have a bed or chair that could accommodate her in the main area. They were pretty much telling me that we could perform, but Viktoriya wouldn't be there.
Now this post isn't about me, but when they told me that Viktoriya wouldn't be coming out, the stubborn Helena welled up in me. This is the stubborn me that has been through many a hardship and tragedy and has refused to back down and refused to let someone else tell me what I can or can't do, just because they think they can. I had 9 very busy women, my own Dad and son with me and here was this floor nurse telling me that we couldn't do what we came to do. That wasn't happening. I went throughout the whole facility, talking to every and any person that looked like they had any kind of influence. I also told the staff that we wouldn't be performing until Viktoriya came out and that we were prepared to wait. And wait we did. Finally Viktoriya was rolled out after about 30 minutes and we went on with the performance. It was a special time for me because this was the Christmas present I was able to give her to show her how much I love her. I will always appreciate the women of 'Friends and Neighbors' for driving the 50 mile round trip and patiently waiting until Viktoriya could listen to us on their busiest of Saturdays to do this for Viktoriya. They truly showed that neighbors and friends are also the angels among us.

The last time I saw her, I felt like I wanted to have a picture taken with her. It was amazing because she seemed really lucid and content that day. When I got out the camera, she actually acted like she knew what I was doing and even smiled when the attendant said "1-2-3 smile"! This is my last special memory of Viktoriya.

On Saturday, January 15th, I got a call from a bellydance friend who told me the sad news. Viktoriya had passed away on Friday. Apparently, she had been doing well and then one of the nurses checked on her and she had quit breathing. They resuscitated her, but she couldn't breathe on her own. She finally quietly passed away.

The funeral was very simple but well-attended. Her daughter, Nikol, gave a simple but beautifully heartfelt eulogy about her mother. Through her tears, she talked about how she had always admired her mom and hoped that someday she could be as beautiful as she was. She spoke of how her mother had many trials, but always told her and her sister, Jessica, that she wouldn't trade it because she had her two girls. She told about how every night she would come in and kiss her and tell her that she loved her. She spoke of the special look she got in her eyes that made her know that she meant it.
Another person who spoke was Sarah Brimhall, one of Viktoriya's best friends and who was very close to her daughters, as well. She had been one of her first students here in Utah. Viktoriya had taken a special interest in Sarah, like she did so many, and had an open door to her any time she wanted. Sarah had been with Viktoriya the day before her accident and spoke of how she was literally glowing with good health and happiness. There is no doubt that she was an extremely beautiful woman on the outside. But what is even more extraordinary is how beautiful she was on the inside and how much love she had for so many people.
I deem myself a fortunate person indeed to have known such a wonderful person as Viktoriya and call her my friend. We had many heartfelt conversations and had a personal understanding of one another. I know that her progression is continuing in Heaven and that her understanding is growing by leaps and bounds. What she couldn't comprehend here on earth, will all be made clear in the world beyond. Viktoriya's life helped me understand the limitless love our Father in Heaven has for each one of his sons and daughters and the mercy that he has extended us in our individual journeys of progression and knowledge in this life. It is through his Son, Jesus Christ, that we are able to look with hope and joy toward the life after this one.
So, Viktoriya, here is my final update on your life and I hope that all who knew you will find peace and know you found rest and joy in the loving arms of those who were waiting to greet you. God be with you until we meet again!

At the funeral with another one of Viktoriya's dear friends

Some of the flowers at her funeral

A Good Week's Work!

2011-01-08T15:44:00.005-07:00

It's been a nice week at work. I work at a remedial high school in one of the 3 behavior units for students who also qualify for Individualized Education Plans (IEP's). I work with Troy Hulse, who has been working for a long time with at-risk boys. He is very good and has a lot of experience with this population. This is the 2nd year he has actually been in a contained classroom, since before that time he worked out in the field, leading work crews for these same students. He actually requested me from another classroom I had been working in, probably partially because I am a female and with these kids, it's imperative that they learn how to work respectfully with males and females, alike. It's a real struggle for them to do that most of the time--just be respectful. There are several obvious reasons why that is so and probably many more less clear cut explanations. For one thing, it is society in general that implicitly condones the disrespect of women, objectifying them into not much more than sex symbols. A lot of these kids have not much more than the prototype of society in general to mold their philosophies and behaviors. Another is that sometimes their sadly lacking home environments have been such that disregarding women and mistreating them is the standard. And variously, they are fettered with the chains of physiological limitations, where their erratic behavior is symptomatic of their condition. Any kind of positive response from them must be gained by medication, precision commands with strict reinforcement follow-up!

Every day I go to work, wondering which kid is going to try and take me down with sharp sarcasm or penchant for mean humor. It's always someone and something different. One day I think I have made tremendous headway with someone and the next day, it's a total reversal of attitude. Most of the time, I am able to avoid any major confrontation because I'm pretty savvy myself, when it comes to street smarts. And, since we are on the level system, there is always the threat of dropping a level if they go too far overboard with disrespect, threats or rude comments.

The funny thing is that I really genuinely like the boys, who range from 15 to 18, in my unit. They all are intelligent, personable and humorous! They can be charming when they want to be. But there is a reason why they are in my unit. Most likely, it is because they were behaviorally out-of-control in the regular high schools that they attended. Most of them have several misdemeanors to their credit and some have even been in detention. So while I quite like most of these boys, I can never trust them. I'm always on my guard. For instance, once they actually invited me to sit with them at their table at lunch. If they actually were to do that, it would be a great sign of status for me. But I didn't buy it. I declined to sit with them. I soon found out that what they were actually planning on doing was getting up and leaving, once I had sat down with them, leaving me at the table alone. But I'm no dummy (totally debatable, however) and saw it coming and the fact that I didn't fall for it actually got me a little more respect!

We see some of these boys mainstreamed back into regular classes, first within the high school itself and some even get to go back to the original high schools that they were expelled from. Basically, when I really get to be rather fond of someone and impressed with their progress, that is the time they will be leaving my class. So, I don't get too much time with a kid who is well-behaved on a consistent basis!

So why has it been a nice week? Well, it was nice because I am getting more comfortable teaching Social Skills and Daily Oral Language Skills to them, which are the two things I teach on a daily basis. I see them actually responding and participating in spite of themselves! When I first started out in this unit at the beginning of November, it was a disaster. They were bound and determined to withhold any respect or even any acknowledgment of my presence as an authority figure. I was so grateful to have a male professional in the classroom, who laid down the law when things got out of hand. Nevertheless, he couldn't see everything that was going on. They have extremely covert ways of trying to undermine me and my efforts to be an integral part of the class workings.

It's been nice because one of the more dominant members of the classroom actually sincerely invited me to join them in a game during free time.   That was definitely a status jump. Now most of the kids have decided that I am worth bringing into a recreational game outside of formal class time! Yes! They have actually started asking me for different pieces of advice about their understanding and clarification of the world around them, whereas before they would only ask those things to Troy. Now, they are trusting me enough to ask me! Major victory! And, when I do give my opinion about different things, they will actually weigh it in their minds and give it thoughtful consideration. They may not agree with it all the time, but they do attend to it! Small though these things may seem, in the realm of at-risk youth, it is huge. They have grown up with many different obstacles and at the forefront is the ability to trust or the permission to respect adults in their lives. For me, it's one thing for a young person who has had every opportunity and encouragement to render me some good faith. But for someone who has not had such assistance, it is the best feeling ever to have them hesitantly at first, extend the hand of friendship and trust. Maybe then, influence for good can be had~and that's what brings me great satisfaction! I hope that you have a great week in whatever you are doing, because we all have immense capacity to make the world around us a little better because of what we do! What do you consider to be a good week at "work"?

Starting A Tradition

2010-12-31T22:05:00.000-07:00

I thought I'd end the year by posting about the 2nd year that Laura has helped the boys make sugar cookies. And that, by my definition is the kick-off of a tradition! Oh, these sugar cookies aren't just any sugar cookies. They were passed down from my grandma to my mother and who knows where my grandmother got the recipe! Now Laura has the antique recipe box, cookie cutters, rolling pin and the flour sifter that belonged to grandma. I think they should rightfully go to her. She spent time making these sugar cookies and passing them out to people when she was the remaining one home, after the rest of us had left into the big world. She really loved to make these and loved the tradition. They brought her a bit of comfort and stability when everyone and everything around her was leaving. And so she passes the tradition on to her two oh-so-willing little boys. I think maybe the tradition will continue on!

This is, after all, serious business!

With a little bit of jocundity mixed in!

And now Mom can relax b/c now someone else is helping to pass on the tradition!

Now if only it wasn't so dang messy. Flour everywhere, I tell ya!

Speaking of Songs....

2010-12-09T19:37:00.006-07:00

Here is the funniest song I've heard and seen in a long time! I wanted to get this before embedding becomes restricted! It came out earlier this week and already has close to 100,000 hits on YouTube! If you haven't seen it, here it is! Do you think it's true? Know that some are upset about the way BYU Co-eds are portrayed here. Would you be mad about this if you were a BYU Co-Ed?

Songwriter Showcase

2010-12-06T22:16:00.003-07:00

After a long work week it's fun to go out and do something. We're lucky because in Provo, UT we've got two Universities and one of them is BYU. There is always something going on and especially this time of year. The students are seeing the end of the Fall Semester and the projects, papers and songs are due. Songs? Well, yes. In the Media Music Division of the College of Fine Arts And Communications, songs are definitely due!
The bi-annual Songwriter Showcase features all original songs written by students in any current style which is monitored and charted by the music industry. I was able to attend this event and styles there were aplenty.
I heard, "Open Heart Surgery", with lyrics that went, "She took my heart right out of my chest, took my heart out while it was still beating. I told myself it would be alright. She placed it back within my chest just for a time...it'll all be fine." I actually loved it and I definitely heard a John Mayer influence!

I kind of enjoyed "California Caught Us Kissing", especially the chorus!

I also heard one song that had an Alanis Morriset influence and another with a definite Cold Play feel to it! These music students are really brilliant with their diverse styles and ability to put their outlooks of life into not only words, but music!

These students naturally write about what matters to them and I heard a lot about unrequited love and broken hearts. "Dreams Ain't For The Brokenhearted" and "Fizzle" are no exceptions. But, there were also songs about Jesus Christ as in "Once Upon A Time" and songs about human frailties in a humorous way demonstrated so well in "Somebody Out There Might Want My Life"! Most of the songs were done on guitar or piano, but there were a few songs done with alternative accompaniments like stringed instruments and one with a pre-recorded remix for accompaniment! We heard 20 songs all in all and I thoroughly loved hearing them. I may even purchase the CD of the show! It's only $10 and maybe someday it will be really valuable because one of these writers/performers will be famous!

It's In The Blood!

2010-11-19T21:11:00.010-07:00

I always wanted to be a competitor and participator in women's sports. So, knowing the basic rules of volleyball, one year I decided to try out for Volleyball at Amos Alonzo Stagg High School in Stockton, CA! I don't even remember if it was JV or Varsity or maybe even both. I just know that I didn't make it and I talked to the coach about it. He told me that I was "too feminine" to make the team. In other words, I sucked. At Lodi Academy, where I was a Sophomore, another coach observed me one day and told me that I'd be a good runner, if I'd just try a little harder. In other words, I was lazy. I tried swimming and dance, both of which I'm glad I did, but never did anything huge with them either. But the one advantage these attempts gave me was that I kept fairly active and was always in fairly good shape! I'm glad that I just didn't give up. All the while I was playing piano and violin, reading everything in sight and ebbing and flowing with my love and social life! I also was very active in my church youth group. So all in all, not a bad life!
Now I have two boys, who, ever since they could walk, have been eager to be competitors and participate in the sports boys like to do. My oldest son didn't stay in one high school long enough to be able to stay on the football team and see any kind of continuity. I remember with fondness how he tried so hard during his first year in football . He'd never been exposed to the sport much before that. So in 8th grade he really tried hard and at the end of the season, he won the Most Improved Player award! He played one more year after that for JV and then moved around a lot after that. But I know he still wanted to be a participant. One thing he found he was especially good at was fighting. Sigh....
From what I understand, it was a major epiphany when the school tough guy (bully) kept taunting him and challenged him to fight. This kid was really tall and towered over Eddie, who is built like a small truck. So on a weekend, in a deserted field, somewhere in Missouri, Eddie and the bully met. Word had spread, in the meantime. The field was lined with about 50 spectators waiting to see the event. Eddie calmly got out of the car his friend drove him in, walked up to the challenger and put him out, complete with a broken nose before anyone could even yell out. It was over that quick and Eddie walked away with a new sense of what he could do. Good or bad, Eddie started to look for ways to develop his "talent".
He found that opportunity with a new sport called MMA. His first fight was against one of the best fighters in the area and it was very humbling. The other guy had him out in about two minutes. I remember asking about his black eye and initially, he told me he and a guy had been horsing around and he got nailed. No big deal. The loss only made him more determined. He hooked up with a team called 'Unbreakable' and began training in Spanish Fork, UT in a little gym. This was done all behind my back because I let it be known that I don't like violent sports. They are too dangerous. The thought of him getting hurt is really scary for me. And I don't understand what makes it such an exciting sport for many men.
One day late in October, I noticed his face was a little beat up, like he'd been in a fight. I now suspected that he was doing MMA and probably training and getting roughed up. He told me then that he had just won $650 in Wyoming over the weekend fighting one of the best fighters in the state. He was the "Fight of the Night" and was the underdog. He came out on top. He said that he had never done anything more draining and tiring but that he loved it. He said that if he didn't get anything for it, he'd still do it. I don't know what to make of that. I can relate in one sense because I like to blog and do it without any compensation whatsoever, although it's great to get paid every once in awhile!
He invited me to one of his fights and I attended the Blood Black and Blue Event at The Man Expo this past Saturday night. It was quite the eye-opener! He won and walked away without too much damage. (I'm just glad he didn't end up like the loser in one of the other fights--his nose was so busted up that blood was spurting from it like a geyser and covered the floor.) He was limping a little bit and the next day he thought he might have hurt his hand. I hope that he enjoys it and then moves on to something else. In the meantime, I think I'll give it my support when I can. His next fight is in January at the McKay Events Center! If he wins, he gets $1000! Go Eddie! I guess it's in the blood!

Eddie With His Agent and Trainer

One of Eddie's team buddies

Getting checked before the fight

The Sunday Hike or Finding A Truth

2010-10-19T18:28:00.001-06:00

It was beautiful weather this past Sunday and I decided to get out in it! I started out on Sunday not knowing where I would end up. My usual hiking partner, E., wasn't with me. So I embarked "not knowing beforehand where I should go..." It was a cool, crisp day and the sky was a bright blue. I knew that I wanted this day to be a part of my memory. As I drove up Big Cottonwood Canyon, I saw some cars parked in front of a sign. I decided to check it out!

It was a really cute picnic area, with lots of mossy rocks in ledges and the creek rapidly flowing in the background. It was a great find for a barbeque with the family someday, but not much of a hike. I kept moving.

Next, I came to a much bigger parking lot. I parked my car and entered the Trailhead area.

This is a beautifully paved road by the creek which I assume is Mill Creek. It has several paths that branch off from the main trail.

I decided to take the trail that goes to Lake Blanche. It was only 2.8 miles. That was perfect. I didn't have any water or hiking shoes, but that seemed like a do-able distance. And the backdrop of Twin Peaks looked so pretty. I set off.

I walked and walked. I met a few people coming down. I kept asking, "Did you get to the lake?" They all said "No, we thought it was around 2 miles, but we never saw one. We gave up and came back." I kept walking. I saw some beautiful stuff! Like this:

But no lake. Did I take a wrong turn? I was really getting thirsty too! I ran into more people coming down who had talked to some other people who said the lake was still waaaaay up there. I kept walking. I was fixated on seeing this lake. The scenery only got better. It spurred me on!

And on....

And on!

I really wish I had the internet on my phone b/c I could have punched in Google Earth and maybe have gotten some coordinates to where I was and how much further this darn lake was. But I'm so old school! Heck, I still have an MP3 player instead of an ipod.

I started going up some extremely steep terrain and I started to feel my system kind of shutting down. I just knew that it couldn't be far, though. It was just before 5 pm. I had been going since 3:30. I needed to see the lake! More people came down and some said I was near. I kept stopping more and more to get my breath. I felt winded and weak. Two ladies came by and I asked them how much further to the lake. They said it was fairly close but it would take them about an hour to get back to the lake from where we were. Well, they obviously weren't avid hikers, it's true, but an hour? Plus they said they were the last ones to leave the area. No one else was up there. OK, that was kind of scaring me. I've heard the stories of the gung ho hikers going too far and ending up getting lost, stranded, hurt, or even worse. I didn't want that to be me. Not today. I struggled on a little more and then I decided to give up. I turned back and made it down the hill in really quick time, leaving the ladies I talked to far behind. It made me wonder how really close I actually must have been. So, while I didn't see the lake, I did see this:

And this:

So I'm not disappointed in my hike at all. Maybe next time I'll be a little more prepared and know a little bit more about the trail I'm taking.

Isn't that the way it is with life? We all basically start out on a course called our life's journey! As we progress along the journey we run into hardships, obstacles and things that aren't really clear. We'll all complete the journey somehow, but some will reach their desired destination and others won't. Maybe it depends on just a few things like preparation, good direction, resources or strength. I've decided that whatever has been my lot on my journey, the one thing I can be is grateful! I can be grateful for the beautiful things I experience on my own journey in life! Maybe it isn't exactly what I had expected, hoped for or planned. But I can't deny that there have been and are many beautiful things that are in my life every single day! Why should I regret or be sorry for what I might not have done or achieved? There is too much abundance in my life for self-reproach!

A New Taste Experience

2010-10-09T09:34:00.008-06:00

I am almost always up for a new experience for my taste palette! I consider myself rather adventurous and unencumbered from culinary prejudices and assumptions. So when I heard about this great new restaurant called El Jaripeo in Salt Lake City on Redwood Road, I was rather interested! I hear that people drive for miles from all over the state to get this authentic Mexican food. Now, I hear this term "authentic" Mexican food tossed around a lot. I hear my fellow gringos talking about how they can really appreciate the authentic food and that they don't succumb to the poor imitation, the generic and the counterfeit stuff thrown out to the public at Taco Bell-esque type lunch counters. They brandish about their superior knowledge of what a good Mexican restaurant should look like, and what the food should taste like! I've heard that you want to go to the small, little establishments to get a really authentic chalupa or burrito. And generally, I listen! I really feel like they know what they are talking about...up to a point!

I'm just not sure what they might think about El Jaripeo! This is, in my opinion, a truly authentic Mexican Restauraunt. Granted, it's food from a specific province of Mexico, Oaxaca, in southern Mexico. The people In Oaxaca are country folk, even indigenous. They live in one of the most rugged and isolating terrains in the country, but also boast a major resort on its coastline called Huatulco. With that in mind, what kind of foods would be found in that region? Well...grasshopper, for one thing. The children run around the fields and collect them for their families. To cook. To eat. They are toasted and put into food as protein and tasty treats! Hey, I'm not knocking it....After all, John the Baptist had them! Hopefully HE was able to toast them too! Well, that is one of the esteemed dishes served at El Jaripeo and people are raving about it. Another interesting dish served here is Mole. What? You heard me....Mole in a sauce..Also the cactus dishes are another specialty that people rave about. I'm very curious about this place and I MAY just venture out. I'll let you know if I do.

In the meantime, happy eating!
image

Daniel's Summit

2010-09-30T22:15:00.000-06:00

Greg and I took the bike to Daniel's Summit this past weekend. Daniel's Summit Lodge is a wonderful place, complete with a great restaurant and general store. Located directly off US 40, close to Heber, it is a great place to enjoy nature both in the warm months and in the winter. It is famous for its snowmobiling trails! I would love to do that sometime. I'm permanently afraid of ATV's because of a freak accident a few years back, when I shattered my nose and de-gloved it from my face, requiring extensive surgery to make it look OK. But I think I could muster the courage to get on a snowmobile and ride it. And what about those Rhino's? They look like miniature jeeps, but have all the get up and go of an ATV, except you can carry passengers and cargo! Then I wouldn't have to drive! I got a picture of one as a couple came in from off the trails. They left their friend outside with water and food. He was as good as gold!

We ate at Daniel's Summit Restaurant. Greg had the Philly Cheesesteak Sandwich and I had Southern Chicken Salad with sugared pecans, red onions and avocado! Delish!

The leaves were just beginning to turn and should be in full force by this weekend!

This Little Boy Has Some Potential!

2010-09-30T21:53:00.001-06:00

I went to my nephew's first soccer game of the season recently. He's a precocious 4-year-old and has lots of energy and he left it all out there in the field. for sure. He got at least 3 goals and led his team to victory! Right, Mom, isn't that how it went? Pretty sure he was the star player! Ha Ha!

Setting up the next kick!

In Thoughtful Contemplation

Going off the field for a drink of water

Can't Take my eyes off the ball!

Hey Guys! I've got something here!

I THINK it was this ball that's in play!

Team Support!

The Miss United Nations Pageant!

2010-09-29T14:36:00.005-06:00

This past weekend I attended the first ever Miss United Nations Pageant at UVU (Utah Valley University) in Orem, UT! I went at the invitation of my friend, Patti, who knows one of the contestants personally! I had actually met Nilli once as well. Her full name is Nilufur Sherzod and she is from Tajikistan. She lived with Patti as a renter for about 2 years! She is very talented and absolutely gorgeous! As one of the main drivers of the UVU International Modeling Club, she was a very prominent part in also getting this pageant started.

The two MC's of the pageant were KSL radio personality and Mormon Tabernacle Choir member, Nikoyo Iyamba and popular performer/singer and also Tabernacle Choir Member, Alex Boye'. They were great together and their rhetoric was sometimes very funny, as Alex can get very animated!! He did some hilarious comedic interpretations of pageant contestants, black audience members, as well as poking fun of himself a lot! Ms. Iyamba has her own line of couture clothing, Nkoyo Bridal, which was modeled during the program. Mr. Boye' performed and handed out copies of his new CD!

It was really fun to see the 9 contestants walk out in native costumes! I wondered what Miss US would wear! Unfortunately, she wasn't represented b/c of a personal tragedy. It must have been a truly tragic event for her to miss out on a chance to win the first Miss United Nations at UVU! I hope everything goes well for her.

Here are some of the fun native costumes!

We were then entertained by each of the contestants in the talent competition and they were very talented! I loved some of the native dances! We saw Flamenco, and various dances from Brazil, Africa, Japan and others. There was one pianist and one singer. They were very brave! Many of these young women had only just learned English within the last few months. They were truly international, coming right from their countries of origin.
Voice of Africa performed some riotous dancing and drum solos!

And the winners are:


Miss Congo Republic wins 2nd Runner-up!

Miss Japan is 1st Runner-up!

AND THE WINNER OF THE $2000 SCHOLARSHIP FROM PAUL MITCHELL SALON IS:

Yes, it was Nilli, Patti's friend from Tajikistan! What a fun thing for her!

Her mother came all the way from Tajikistan just to see her participate in the pageant! I think she got her money's worth! I know I did!

Our Hike To Dog Lake

2010-09-21T19:22:00.001-06:00

My son Eddie and I took a hike (roundtrip 6 miles) to Dog Lake, actually a watershed area located in Big Cottonwood Canyon. First of all, I don't know why they call it 'Dog' Lake, because no dogs or horses are allowed because of the watershed status.

I almost quit towards the first part because this was meant to be a leisurely hike, nothing major. It was on a Sunday after all and I really try not to do hard physical labor on that day. However, on other days, all my efforts to do hard physical labor are mostly in vain as well! But what do you know, after the first 100 feet, we ran into a very steep incline and it seemed to go on forever. I panted and gasped and stopped for air and of course, Eddie was ready to bound up the hill like a gazelle. But he was a nice son and waited for me. He asked some hikers on their way down if it was uphill all the way and they basically said yeah. I told Eddie I would go for 15 more minutes like this and then if it didn't improve, our hike was over. Fortunately, it did improve and it actually was very mild from then on out!

During the incline part of the hike, we had to stop often, due to Mom's lack of physical stamina and energy. But we had a diversion and that was my camera. We took quite a few silly shots. I had the idea that we could pose in some beautiful ferns. I hope that the difference between my pose, and Eddie the Yettie's pose is vastly different....

The scenery, as we wound our way now more gradually up the incline, was truly beautiful!

The leaves were just barely starting to turn! I couldn't believe it, one older man when we asked about how far the lake was, actually thought that Eddie and I were brother/sister, girlfriend/boyfriend, husband/wife. Poor Eddie. I don't think he took that too well! I told Eddie that he looks a lot older than he really is, and that the poor man must be losing his visual clarity in his declining years. Plus, I am really immature looking. What else could I tell him? (I was secretly loving it!)

We ran into some Moose (or is that Meese?) grazing along the trail. I was kind of nervous because I've heard that Moose are dangerous animals known to charge annoying people hiking by in their territory. But Eddie the Yettie welcomed the opportunity to get as close as possible to take a few shots. Believe me, I had some trees sighted in to run behind just in case things got dicey! We even saw a Mother and Baby moose quietly grazing in the forest!

We finally arrived at Dog Lake and it is certainly not anything to brag about. I might even be tempted to say it's a real dog! It's just a tiny little body of water with a sandy shore on all sides. But we were excited to have reached our destination and be on our way back. Of course we took a few more pictures because that's what you do when you have a blog to put them on!

The Family Pie

2010-08-23T15:30:00.009-06:00

We are influenced by news that we hear and read about. National and World events are happening at an ever-increasing rate of speed! Often I count on my husband to update me on major happenings in the world. I want to make sure I am getting the right story and the right take, though. For me, the best way to understand an event is to recount my understanding of what happened.
So, how concerned are you about property or money settlement issues within your extended family? I know it can be a sore spot. When a parent or relative gives out holdings in an unfair way or in a way that people don't agree with, tensions within families can mount. But is it worth killing your own family over? C'mon, that is going waaaaay over the line in terms of my own understanding. I say, just let them have the heirloom china and wish them good luck with it. You can't take it with you anyway!

But that is exactly what happened over the weekend in Louisa, VA. A man shot and killed his own son and nephew in an ongoing dispute over a piece of property, not to mention the 4 others that were wounded in the fray. Then police shot and killed him after he fired on two deputies and released his pit bull on them. Apparently, this 1.5 acres was a real hot commodity among family members. Police were called on multiple occasions to settle property disputes amongst the clan. But it never got violent until yesterday. Well, sir, I hope you are happy. You're dead, your son is dead, your nephew is dead and that ought to be a fun little party on the other side! And who gets the 1.5 acres? I guess whoever was left alive! I hope the remaining relatives will be a little more wise. Wow! I used to live in VA. I'd have to say you might be a redneck if... you bring out the .22 caliber when your limited vocabulary of "Thisheer is ma land, ain't no one else's!" fails to bring about a unanimous agreement!

May I suggest a few ways to insure a peaceful estate settlement when the time arrives?

1. Only involve the individuals who are named in the will or trust. The fewer outsiders and outside opinions, the better! Spouses and children who are not directly a part of the settlement don't need to be involved.

2. Start the conversation! Many times it is awkward to even mention that someone won't be around forever. Many times people are afraid that they will sound greedy talking about estate affairs. A possible good start to this conversation might be: "Mom, Dad, I know you love us. You have taught us how to be thoughtful, caring people, by example. I am reasonably certain that you want us to care for you in your old age and for each other when you are gone. You could do a lot to keep the spirit of our family alive and healthy after you are gone by talking to us now. You could make it immensely easier on all of us by giving us some information about your wishes and plans. This is not about money. It is about relationships and trust and responsibility.”

3. Establish trust between family members - Family history and child rearing methods of prior generations can foster distrust between siblings. Competition among siblings is common. Although it might not be the easiest time, it is a crucial time to build trust among family members. Do so with open dialogue and transparency of intent. Now is not the time to have hidden agendas.

4. Learn as much as possible - Usually there is one primary executor but if the work is shared, not only is it easier on the executor, the beneficiaries will also have a better understanding of what is involved and have a greater stake in the best resolution for the whole family.

5. Create Unity by: Assuming the positive intent of others, not the negative, being openminded and knowing that everyone doesn't see things in exactly the same way, not allowing bullying, keeping things confidential between those involved, stay involved in the decision-making even though it may make you uncomfortable, have a sense of humor and stay connected in between official meetings.

6. Have regularly appointed meetings to keep everyone abreast of developments and decisions. It can be done in person, with conference calls or whatever way is best suited to your situation.

7. Have fun in the process! Make mundane things like moving the folks into the board and care home an adventure. Have events where everyone can have fun interaction. Great memories imprinted on the mind and in the heart make a solid foundation upon which to build your relationship bridge from Generation One to Generation Two.

Hopefully this will be a guide so that when you have to divide up the assets from the sale of the family home, you'll know exactly what to do!

Meteor Shower Debaucle

2010-08-13T12:26:00.009-06:00

We decided at 12:00 am last night to head up the Canyon with our dog to one of the parks there and watch the Perseid Meteor Shower. The Perseid Meteor Shower happens every year as a result of the super comet, Swift-Tuttle, and it's minuscule remains rocketing through the sky at incredible speeds. It was at its height last night, averaging 40 - 50 sightings per hour. Tonight will still be a good night to view it, although sightings will be down to 20 per hour (possibly higher in the northern hemisphere)!
Apparently, people are very much aware of this phenomenon and the parks were full of expectant observers. We scouted out the park and found a wonderful spot to view the night sky. We first put down a tarp, followed with two sleeping bags to lay on with two blankets on top and 4 pillows. We were set! It was so warm and comfy looking up at the night sky. There must have been at least 150 people spread around the park, mostly younger, since midnight is a little hard for most folks to herd small children out to watch night spectacles like this!

Every time a comet made a path across the night sky, there were exclamations, yells, screams, applause, you name it. This was a very enthusiastic crowd. I wasn't above making a few appreciative exclamations myself! I was prepared to spend several very enjoyable hours watching this, as our dog Evee curled up on one side and DH on the other.

All of a sudden people started yelling and screaming, only this time it wasn't because of any fireworks in the night sky. The sprinklers had come on. These sprinklers weren't just little sprayers either. These were geysers, shooting water 100 feet in all directions. We were right in the path of two of them. I immediately shot up, grabbing my two pillows and flip flops. Greg, on the other hand lay there, covering his head with the blankets. I told him to "Get up! Grab the stuff!" A few seconds later he did. But not before the water had soaked our spread pretty thoroughly. His reasoning was that at least he was dry!

We took stock of the damage and being the survivors we are, decided to rearrange our pillows and blankets elsewhere where the sprinklers weren't on, as did the other observers in the area. We found that if we flipped the tarp, blankets and pillows, they were still fairly dry. So back down we went, thinking, "Wow! The county might have known people would want to watch this...."

It was a beautiful 10 minutes....because that's all we had before the next set of sprinklers, in the path of which we were, went on full force. This time, I just stayed there keeping my head under the blankets until the full force of the water made a pass. Now, everything was totally soaked and my night was done. I was DONE.

So much for watching the beautiful display in the comfort of our makeshift observatory in the company of DH, maybe falling asleep in the warmth of his arms. We had to cut bait and run! This is one where the story is better than the actual experience! I believe Greg has his own version here! (Hopefully our versions match!) Have a great day!

Hugs,

Helena

Family Day At Lagoon!

2010-08-10T16:42:00.005-06:00

These are selfless parents!

Aunt Alicia carrying someone else's floatie! Also very selfless!

Joseph and Brandon

Show me where to go, Dad!

I know what you're up to!

Uncle Leland getting some sun


The Thomas Family Darn it, I was there, but didn't come up with any photos of myself!? Maybe that's because it's my blog and I don't have to put photos of me in swim attire unless I want to! My Blog, my say! Mwaa ha ha ha ha!

Little Karissa

2010-08-10T16:23:00.001-06:00

These are a few pictures of my friend's cute little girl, baby Karissa. She is about 3 months old and is the most alert, petite little thing ever. She had a respiratory issue when she was first born, but luckily, is doing just fine now. Isn't she sweet? She has a huge cowlick on the back of her head. It just sticks straight up, and no matter how much her mom gels, slicks, combs or sprays, it just pops right back up, like a little rooster. It just makes her that much more endearing!

A Little Jaunt Up The Hill

2010-07-23T19:30:00.008-06:00

This last Tuesday, Eddie and Joseph took a walk. They walked all the way to the top of Mt. Timpanogos! A 19 mile round trip with a 1 mile elevation gain---OK, maybe that would qualify as a hike! I just wanted to put up some of the pictures that they took and I think these will tell the tale! I really want to make this trek. But I think I will need a few things before I make the attempt. I'd need at least one hiking pole, some better hiking shoes, a knee brace, an ankle support and an oxygen tank. But other than that, I'm good to go!

Just look at the pristine beauty at this elevation. It must have been breathtaking! Here is Joseph at the year round glacier formation. Many people will slide down this glacier and get hurt, like the one girl who had to be carried down in a stretcher with a broken ankle the same day as their hike. Not many people were around there on Monday. The boys passed several people on the way up, but none going down! They pretty much had the whole place to themselves!

Mountain goats were nearby and available for photo ops! They were just shedding their shaggy winter coats! The Yettie and Joseph spent about an hour chasing the goats around and teasing them. They are surely a little less approachable since the boys visited their craggy home.

At the top of the climb is a small weather station or shelter in case of foul weather or some hardy souls want/need to spend the night. They made sure that they would be remembered long after their departure.

Finally they came winding back down the hill and we were there at the trailhead to meet them. They actually ran out of water on the way down and must have consumed a gallon each of water at the drinking fountain.

It amazes me how much energy they have. They were none the worse for the wear afterwards. They were business as usual the next day. So why can't they bring their dishes upstairs after they eat? It boggles the mind.

Last Day of June

2010-06-30T21:07:00.001-06:00

My friend Elena and I went bike riding to the Falls today! Elena just got her bike and this was the maiden voyage for it! This was my first ride to the Falls this year. It was really fun and we hope to do it some more this summer. Elena is a great bike riding partner because she plugs her earphones in and is content to ride. That's how I like to do it too. Just ride and enjoy the view and maybe even push myself so I can get a bonus cardio workout. That's what we did (except when we stopped and took some pictures of each other)!

It's Not In The Getting But In The Keeping

2010-06-29T20:32:00.009-06:00

I keep things way too long and while I may not technically be considered a 'hoarder', it's difficult for me to let go of brochures, pamphlets, receipts, dishes, clothing, old school assignments, furniture, bedding, or anything unless it is absolutely useless. There could always be a use for this, I say to myself! And sometimes when I have let something go, I have found that there are times when I missed the thing I threw or gave away. I remember right away two things specifically that come to mind. The handmade doll I got from Nova Scotia, that I handed over to a missionary companion of mine so I could have peace in the apartment. The gorgeous original art from Irish Artist Ann Gorman depicting a young woman trying her best to look beyond her circumstances entitled, 'Dreamer', given to a friend going through a rough spot. I really valued those items and yet somehow felt it would be better to give them to someone else. Was it wise to give these away if I valued them and still miss them? I think it was!

Something has helped me cut down on my accumulations and need to collect! It is the fact that I have had to leave everything behind more than once in my life. Most people, when they move, take most of their possessions with them. Not I! I have had to walk away from everything when I've moved! That happened once on a huge scale and then on a smaller scale, 5 other times. I've left furniture, a piano, a car, all my clothing, appliances, heirlooms, hobbies and a myriad of other things.

But the leaving behind of possessions has taught me a very important lesson--with most of the things I left behind, I've been able to do just fine without, either because I can replace them or just because they weren't essential to my survival and I am still alive without them. As a matter of fact, because I have left certain things behind, it has freed me up to pursue new interests and hobbies
that I might not have otherwise! After all there are only so many hours in the day that you can use and if the object of what you spent your time on is gone, you are free, in essence, to pursue other things to fill your time! For example, the sewing machine I left behind that I didn't replace allowed me to drop that pastime which filled a lot of my time and pursue new things (like blogging)!

Here are a couple of things I think are true regarding possessions!

"The wise man carries his possessions within him" -Bias

"Treasure your relationships, not your possessions" -Anthony J. D'Angelo

"The ideals which have lighted my way, and time after time have given me new courage to face life cheerfully, have been Kindness, Beauty, and Truth. The trite subjects of human efforts, possessions, outward success, luxury have always seemed to me contemptible." -Albert Einstein

Now, of course, I just finished confessing that I am sort of a pack rat and I do, after all, own a second blog that has everything to do with collecting "things"! But I know that these things are really not essential most of the time!

If I were to look back and wonder what it is that I think was and is the most valuable and essential to me, it would have to be my kids. I have the two greatest boys ever. I feel lucky that I was able to spend quality time with them before I had to give them up. Yes, I DO know a lot about leaving things behind and giving things up. I lost my youngest son due to a fraudulent divorce decree before he turned two, never to raise him, and my oldest son at 10 the same way. It was heartbreaking for me. I spent thousands of dollars trying to correct it. As criminal as this was, it is considered civil law and civil law is different than criminal law. But what I DID luck out on is that I somehow knew that I needed to do a lot of the following and luckily, I think I did:

Just for this morning, I am
going to step over the laundry,
and pick you up and take you to the park to
play.

Just for this morning, I will
leave the dishes in the sink,
and let you teach me how to put that puzzle
of yours together.

Just for this afternoon, I will
unplug the telephone and
keep the computer off, and sit with you in the
backyard and blow bubbles.

Just for this afternoon, I will
not yell once, not even a
tiny grumble when
you scream and whine for the ice
cream truck, and I will buy you one if
he comes by.

Just for this afternoon, I won't
worry about what you are
going to be when you grow up, or second guess
every decision I have made
where you are concerned.

Just for this afternoon, I will let
you help me bake cookies, and I won't
stand over you trying to fix them.
Just for this afternoon, I will take
us to McDonald's and buy us both a
Happy Meal so you can have both toys.

Just for this evening, I will hold
you in my arms and tell you a story
about how you were born and how
much I love you.

Just for this evening, I will let
you splash in the tub and
not get angry.

Just for this evening, I will let
you stay up late while we sit on the
porch and count all the stars.

Just for this evening, I will
snuggle beside you for hours,
and miss my favorite TV shows.
Just for this evening when I run
my finger through your hair
as you pray, I will simply be grateful that God
has given me the greatest gift ever
given.

I will think about the mothers
And fathers who are searching
for their missing children,
the mothers and fathers who are
visiting their children's graves
instead of their bedrooms, and mothers and
fathers who are in hospital rooms watching
their children suffer senselessly, and screaming inside that they can't
handle it anymore.

And when I kiss you good night I
will hold you a little tighter, a
little longer. It is then, that I will
thank God for you, and ask
him for nothing, except one more day.............

Was I perfect? That's a laugh! But what I do know is that my boys and I are great friends. They include me in a lot of what they do, more so than any other person. That is a great compliment to me since they could very well exclude me in a lot of things.
So, while I AM quite a collector of stuff, I hope that I have learned what the most valuable things in life are and if I am ever called upon at a moment's notice to drop all save the most precious, I think I will be able to do it!

disclaimer: I did not write the above poem, and I don't know where it comes from. It was stored on my computer from somewhere. If you know where it comes from, please let me know so I can assign proper credit!

A Funeral To Attend

2010-06-14T22:03:00.006-06:00

I thought I'd post this before I head out the door. Do you like funerals? I really don't. But since my Dad has requested me to go, I go. I really don't even know this person. It's one of my Dad's cousins that he hasn't seen in a bizillion years and whom I've never even met. It's for the son of one of my Grandma's sister's kids. But when Dad makes a special request, I do it, because I don't know how many more events he will even be able to attend. He is getting very frail. He knows it, but he has such courage in his ever-growing weakness. My hat goes off to him in the face of his own inevitable mortality. My mom has been gone for a year and a half and I know it has been so lonely for him. He had a pacemaker put in before she died because he wanted to be around to take care of her until she died, which he did. So the pacemaker has kept his own heart going but he continues to get weaker and weaker. His legs will give out on him unexpectedly for no reason. And he gets really tired very easily. Yet he continues to put in full days at work. He owns condos that he rents out and he does all the maintenance himself. When someone recently moved out, of course the place was trashed. (Why do so many renters trash where they live?) So he has completely redone everything himself--replaced the horrible kitchen counters, fixed the broken dishwasher, put in a new microwave, painted the rooms, put in new linoleum, re-done the garage, etc. etc. He is amazing! I hope that I have the motivation he does when I get to be in my 80's.

But today, I'll be at a funeral. Hope you have a wonderful day!

Us (My sister, Laura, Dad and me before heading to the funeral

Memorial Day Gardening

2010-05-31T22:21:00.002-06:00

Home Depot was really crowded today! I think everyone had my same intentions--get some flowers to spruce up the yard for summer. And boy did they have the blooms out in full array. There was most any kind of flower you could imagine blooming and ready to be re-potted or planted in your own personal space. I could have really done it up right, I tell you. But I kept my self control and got out of there only spending about $25! From that I was able to pot 2 large planters and 2 hanging baskets. I have them out on my deck and it brightens up the surroundings considerably! Along with the hummingbird feeder and the modest garden down below, I think that my summer planting urge has been quelled for awhile unless I see a really great sale later on this summer!

Out Tooling Around Ophir

2010-05-30T21:51:00.008-06:00

Greg and I took a little 2 hour motorcycle ride today out to a little place called Ophir, UT. It is this tiny little mining town that has a very small population and retains all of the charm and quaintness of somewhere right out of time.

The weather was gorgeous and the traffic was down so we had lots of room on the freeways and highways to just go! We rode through Lehi, Saratoga Springs, Eagle Mountain and Cedar Fort. The further we got out on Highway 73, the more wide open it became, until we were riding with miles of vast space on either side of us, with the mountains looming far away in the distance. There was not a tree for miles and yet in the distance I could see the one outline of a lone tree in a distant field, its stark outline providing a memorable backdrop to the nothingness in front of us!

Finally we turned off onto a little road, which led us into the very tiny town of Ophir, with a population of 23 last Census count in 2000. To me, it seemed a little larger now than that. There were some really nice, even ornate homes lining the street on either side and a city hall. As we drove slowly down the street, we passed an old mining shaft where miners once combed through the mountain looking for silver deposits. It is said that once upon a time there was so much silver there that the Indians around the area used silver bullets! In this town, unlike on the road we had just turned off, there were many trees and they made a quiet whisper through the hills, as if to tell us that there was a story that needed to be told. We passed a few very old buildings and then we found a large recreation area with a swimming pool and a camping area! What a fun recreational activity you could have there. We had parked to walk around and stretch and people driving by all waved to us really friendly! (Except for the couple on the Harley-Davidson!)

First Post Office turned Tavern turned Drug Store!

The old Mining shaft
We turned homeward after stretching our legs and trying to work the kinks out of the rear ends. Frankly, that was about all we wanted to go today. It's been awhile since we have taken a real motorcycle trip. But that was certainly a fun outing and goes to show that here in Utah we have a lot of great places to visit within a short distance. A motorcycle is really the way to do it too!

I Think I Like This Version Better

2010-04-23T21:18:00.001-06:00

Sometimes It Takes A Sign And Even Then I'm Clueless

2010-04-02T08:50:00.005-06:00

Yesterday was a very uneventful day for me, until 10:30 PM. My son, E, called me on the phone. He lives here in town and is going to college, majoring in some sort of Geography where one does environmental planning for cities and towns.

I laughed to myself, thinking, "He really must think I'm naiive if he thinks he is going to pull one over on me tonight."
After a few words of greeting and small talk, I asked him if he thought he was going to try and get me for April Fool's, because I was ready for it. He said, "What? It's April Fool's? Oh, now you're really not going to believe me when I tell you what I'm about to tell you. I'll just call you back another time"
My curiosity got the best of me and I said, "Oh just go ahead and tell me."

After a long, pregnant pause he said, "I've been expelled from the University. I was in the administration office on Tuesday and these three guys started getting insulting with me, making fun of my Indiana State hat, and it escalated from there. I was having a bad day anyway, and I just couldn't handle these three f_____s messing with me like that, so I ended up breaking one guys nose, breaking a knee and laying out the third."

Why is that so believable? Because E. loves to fight. He does MMA throwdowns and just waits for anyone to even look like they want to fight. He would be in the fray in 2 seconds. He's a really good boy, but he has that little bit of extra testosterone in him that needs an outlet. If he had a girlfriend or something I'm sure he would settle right down. But no girlfriend, he's busy with school right now. ;) I've been surprised that he hasn't gotten into more trouble than he has. So far he had kept it down to a few late night escapades with paint ball guns, and one or two meetings in an empty parking lot, but nothing involving the law or disciplinary processes.

At this point I was still skeptical and rolling my eyes, but then he told me that his court date was May 15th and that he was probably, in addition to being expelled, looking at 6 months in jail. He told me that his roommate's dad was an attorney and would probably agree to represent him for a reduced rate and that he could probably get the sentence down to maybe a month, and that he could get it expunged later. As far as the University, he could probably enroll in the "other" university in town, although it doesn't have his major and he would totally lose this semester, that is just finishing up.

My despair began to set in and I started seeing a bleak outlook for my son, who I had such high hopes for. In addition to finishing up school, I also had hoped that he would serve a two year mission for our church. He is 21 right now, and the standard age for serving is 19. He has had braces until just this past month and that has made it impossible for him to go out at this time, as they don't allow missionaries to go out with braces. So he has just gone ahead and finished more school. With a police record and being expelled from school, a mission for the church would be next to impossible. They just don't let just anyone go out. You can't have felons out serving the Lord. They need to at least have their acts cleaned up!

My eyes started tearing up and I started telling him things like, "I KNEW that MMA throwdown stuff was bad. You start thinking you can take it outside the ring. Now look where it's gotten you. Are you on steroids? What the heck were you thinking? And this, after all my begging and pleading for you to keep yourself out of trouble...." I told him I had to go.

I told my husband what had happened and I was in tears because this was devastating to me.

Then the phone rang, and there was E. on the phone again. I prayed that he was gong to tell me, APRIL FOOL'S! !!!

And he did.

Avoiding A Ticket And Finding A Memory

2010-04-01T21:18:00.010-06:00

The day could have been so much worse than it was. Actually it was a pretty good day! But it could have been a crummy day...if I had gotten that ticket.

Every city has one--a road that says 30 mph but where everyone wants to go faster because the very nature of the road invites you to. The road is wide, uncrowded, open, long, made for driving......well, faster. I was driving that street, as I do almost every day, since it's how I get home in Sandy, Utah. My mind was elsewhere, thinking about a million other things, planning what to make for dinner, planning out the next day, weighing the importance of one activity against another, wondering if I will have a job by the end of this month. My speed crept up, unbeknownst to me, to about 20 miles over the speed limit. I was in my driving trance.

I noticed a quick flash out of the corner of my eye. I looked up and saw an on-coming car. Wait, did that car just flash its headlights? Why, I believe it did. I don't see that too often here in the city. As a matter of fact, hardly ever.
When I lived in Floyd, Virginia, I saw it all the time. The shortest way from Floyd to Christiansburg is Rt. 8, a 30-mile stretch of country highway, with a speed limit of 55 mph. Since Floyd is such a tiny place (it boasts all of one stoplight), one finds many occasions to go to the larger town of Christiansburg! It is a beautiful stretch of road, with hills and trees and views that are breathtaking. After all, it is right on the border of the Blue Ridge Mountains. While there are many places where one needs to go much slower than 55 because of the sharp turns, the blind entrances, and the steep uphill climbs, not to mention some sheer drop-offs, there are other places where 55 mph is just really tough to abide by. I often found myself flying down the road at speeds that were closer to common freeway speeds on I-15.

My Virginia Stomping Grounds

Of course, it was a favorite lurking place for the County Sheriff's men. They had such clever places to hide. A favorite place for them was right at the bottom of a hill that was hidden until you passed them, almost always over the speed limit. Of course they weren't always there, so you just had to know that maybe, they would be waiting. But country folk look out for one another. Just as it is so common for people to raise a friendly hand in greeting as they pass each other in opposite directions on the road, so it is also the practice to warn your fellow southern citizen that the Fuzz is on the prowl! You can almost be certain that if someone knows that the cops are in the vicinity, you will get a warning flash from your oncoming friend! I can't even count the number of times I was saved from a sure write-up because of the friendly flash of an oncoming car's headlights!

But this time, it was the neighborly flash of a car from my city neighborhood. It was surprising, really. Nevertheless it came at a welcome time, because sitting on the side of the road as I rounded the bend at the crest of the hill, was a cop. He had his speed gun out, ready to sock it to me. But he didn't get me that day, thanks to the flash of some headlights from an unknown neighbor.

While that incident made me very grateful and happy, heck it saved me at least $80, it also created a bittersweet memory of the life I once lived in the hills of Virginia, where cops have it hard because everyone warns their neighbors and where they greet one another with raised hands as they pass on the road.

Not To Keep

2010-03-24T21:50:00.013-06:00

A couple of things came together simultaneously for me just recently. I ran across these pretty gruesome x-ray pictures of Sgt. Dan Powers, who had been savagely attacked by a teenage Iraqi insurgent, having a 9-inch knife plunged into his skull. At first he thought he had been punched in the head. Amazingly, after being airlifted to Walter Reed Medical Hospital and after a grueling rehabilitation, where he needed to learn how to walk again, Sgt. Powers regained his physical abilities. He went on to rejoin his fellow paratroopers out of Fort Bragg, NC and boarded a plane, headed for his next assignment--in Afghanistan.

Rejoin his fellow paratroopers? Are you kidding? What must his family have been thinking as he went back out? He just narrowly escaped with his life in tow and now he's going out again to risk it? I can only shake my head in disbelief....did the military really need him that badly? Or did he choose to go back on his own? I don't know the whole story. If anyone does, I'd love an update. Does he have a firm conviction of what he is fighting for, or is he just in it for the paycheck (such as it is)? Does he like the excitement or is he doing it for the camaraderie of it all? These things are a mystery to me and I can't help but be deeply touched that these men can go through this kind of duress and go back without being physically hog-tied. They go back willingly and bravely. Did he have a wife or a sweetheart? What was she thinking as he left her yet again.

I found this poem a couple days ago and I think it is appropriate for this scenario, though not in all aspects.

Not To Keep

Robert Frost

They sent him back to her. The letter came

Saying... And she could have him. And before

She could be sure there was no hidden ill

Under the formal writing, he was in her sight,

Living. They gave him back to her alive-

How else? They are not known to send the dead-

And not disfigured visibly. His face?

His hands? She had to look, and ask,

"What was it, dear?" And she had given all

And still she had all-they had-they the lucky!

Wasn't she glad now? Everything seemed won,

And all the rest for them permissible ease.

She had to ask, "What was it, dear?"

"Enough,

Yet not enough. A bullet through and through,

High in the breast. Nothing but what good care

And medicine and rest, and you a week,

Can cure me of to go again." The same

Grim giving to do over for them both.

She dared no more than ask him with her eyes

How was it with him for a second trial.

And with his eyes he asked her not to ask.

They had given him back to her, but not to keep.

___________________________________
And so, as they send their sons, husbands, fathers, brothers out once, twice, maybe for the last time, do they have a sufficient reason to believe that this was what was meant to be? Can they be at peace with themselves and with God. I think some can, and some definitely can't. And thus comes the unbearable sadness and despair and possibly bitterness that the loss of that loved one brings.

I feel grateful to have the belief and knowledge that when I send a loved one away, as I have done and I will do again, more than once more, I know that it won't be the last time I'll ever see them. In fact, I have quite a bright hope that not only will I see loved ones again after I "send them away" or they are "sent away", but that I will have the chance to associate with them on a bright and happy level someday and somewhere. I'm not exactly sure of all the details, but I know I will see them again. Will I be sad? Will I miss them? Of course! But my belief may just help to carry me through those dark days of missing whoever I may have to send away for a little while! But in the end, I will keep!

A Little Boy's Prayer

2010-03-08T14:18:00.013-07:00

I went to church with my Dad yesterday, as I do every other Sunday. I do this so that he won't have to go to church by himself all the time. Have you ever gone to church by yourself? Sometimes it's OK, but I prefer to go with someone, as I'm sure he does as well. It was Fast and Testimony meeting. Fast and Testimony Meeting happens monthly on the first Sunday of the month and it is exactly what the name implies. We come to the meeting, ideally having fasted for 2 whole meals and with the money saved from not eating those meals, donate that money to Fast Offering, which, in turn, is used for helping the poor around the world. The members of our church are also given an opportunity, as they are moved, to bear their testimonies about the Gospel of Jesus Christ and their feelings for it.

Towards the beginning of the meeting, an elderly gentleman got up and told about his son-in-law in Afghanistan. He is commander in chief of a company of Utah marines there. This past week he lost 2 young men in combat. It turns out that both of them were from here in Orem and both went to Mountain View HS. One was Lance Cpl. Nigel Olsen, 21, and the other, Lance Cpl. Carlos Aragon, 19. He told of how his daughter was so sad and devastated about the loss and would be attending the funerals of both these young men, and how tough it has been for everyone to lose these fine, valiant, young men. The two news articles are here and here.

Then he went on to tell about his own little 3-year old grandson, who was with him this last week, before anyone knew of the incident. He recollects that as they were in the car driving together, his little grandson said emphatically, "I need to pray for my Daddy. My Daddy's in trouble and I need to pray for him now." This grandfather, who was also accompanied by one of his own sons, stopped and let the little boy say a prayer for his Daddy in Afghanistan. He goes on to say that this little boy said the most heartfelt, mature prayer on behalf of his father, pleading to the Lord to save his Father and bring him back home to him someday. It was beyond a 3-year-old's capacity, but he was witnessing it along with his son. After the prayer, the little boy returned to being a 3-year-old. But for a moment, they witnessed a true "out of the mouths of babes" experience. Later they learned that this company had been under some extremely dangerous circumstances, and of the two losses.

This reminds me of how special our little children are and how in tune to the quiet whisperings of the Spirit they are. Now, granted, I'm sure this little boy has been taught by his parents to pray when he feels the need. But more than that, I feel he has been taught to recognize what those quiet promptings are and what they feel like. That little boy, in turn, taught me how far I have to go to be able to feel, recognize, and act upon those promptings that are directions from God himself through his Holy Spirit.

What does the influence of the Spirit feel like? Here are some descriptions that I've recently heard: "When you feel pure intelligence flowing into you, it may give you sudden strokes of ideas." "A sensation of light.", "it feels like sunshine," "a feeling of comfort, like a warm blanket", "a still, small, voice", "feelings of "peace, hope and joy." Have you ever felt any of those feelings? If so, chances are that it was the influence of the Holy Ghost!

Next, I ask myself, how can I better recognize these feelings? The Lord has counseled us to "be still, and know that I am God." Maybe if I can provide myself a still and quiet time each day when I am not bombarded by television, computer, video games or other distractions, I can allow that still, small voice an opportunity to provide personal revelation and to whisper sweet guidance, reassurance, and comfort. Maybe I can save myself a whole lot of unnecessary grief and regret if I can do that!

And last, it all reminds me of a poem that I heard put to music a few years back. The words are from Charles Dickens:

They are idols of hearts and of households. They are angels of God in disguise; His sunlight still sleeps in their tresses, His glory still gleams in their eyes; Those truants from Home and from Heaven, They have made me more manly and mild; And I know now how Jesus could liken The Kingdom of God to a child.

Photos from Flickr!

I Told You So

2010-03-04T23:25:00.002-07:00

I have never enjoyed a song more by Carrie Underwood than I did on American Idol '09 when she and Randy Travis came and performed this song live for the first time. Let me tell you how it was for me. I heard it one time and it's simple melody and words became branded in my mind. This morning I woke up with it playing in my head . I looked it up on YouTube and it brought tears to my eyes. Am I getting sentimental? No, not getting....I have always been. But what a sweet and haunting song. Judge for yourself! Although Randy Travis wasn't at his best, Carrie Underwood showed once again what a versatile singer she is, when it comes to Country Music!

My List of 10

2010-02-22T21:43:00.002-07:00

Some of my wonderful bloggy friends have been doing lists. Lists of things that make them happy. And boy, it makes me happy just reading the lists of all those wonderful things. It certainly is a fun exercise! I think it would be fun to list 100 blogs that make me happy right here, right now! I could list 100 types of flowers that gladden my eyes and "fill up my senses". (John Denver, Annie's Song) I could list 100 songs that I absolutely love and I could list 100 people who have made and make my life beautiful. I could list my top 100 quotes, my top 100 foods, or my top 100 book list. You know, I may do that some day when I have a lot of time to recollect, rhuminate and resonate. Today won't be that day. But I would like to try and put out a mini list of sorts. I think a list of 10 is a great little start. So here is my list of 10 things that make me happy today!

1. I am so happy when I have a beautiful place to walk or hike. I had that today. There is a park in Sandy, UT called Granite Park. You take the trail and it leads you out to a long overlook where you can see for miles all over the City and you are overshadowed by the awesome mountains. It literally goes for miles. I walked there today.

2. I am happy that I can spend time with my Dad. He is 81 years old and at the twilight of his years. It's nice to just be around him and see how even at his late stage, he is still progressing in his life and being moulded by God into the person he is meant to be while on this earth. I believe in that, you see.

3. I am happy that I have gone through trials in my life because I now see that they helped me to become a deeper, more thoughtful, more insightful human being.

4. I am happy for humor! There is nothing better than to be caught by surprise at something that strikes you funny and then to let it out in a chuckle or a belly laugh. Ah, good for the soul. I did that today when I talked to my Dad, read a friend's blog and talked on the phone with my hubby!

5. I am happy for food! I love food! Why do we make food our enemy so often? I am here to tell you I would sacrifice 2 inches in my waist just to enjoy the food I like. Last night I cooked for my family and we ate. It was wonderful to be able to enjoy it with them!

6. I am happy that I didn't have to do the dishes last night. Do you know who did them? My Dad! I meant to go up and do them after I digested my food, but I was too late. He had already done them. My Mom had a keeper when she got him.

7. I am happy that the Olympics are almost over. They had me glued to the set a lot. Especially the speed skating events, and especially when Apolo Ohno skated. He is the only celebrity I follow on Twitter. Did anyone see him on Dancing With the Stars? I didn't, but am wishing that I did. He is the true epitome of an Olympian. Gracious, beautiful, charismatic and breathtaking.

8. I am happy for blogging! I never liked writing as much as I do now. Writing in high school was just another requirement, to be avoided if at all possible. (What is the minimum number of pages I can get away with writing? Maybe the teacher won't notice so much if I double space it!) What is it that makes expression in a blog so much fun? Knowing me, it's a phase and at some point, you'll wonder where I went. But right now, at this time, blogging is fun!

9. I am happy that Spring is just around the corner! I can feel it! You go outside and there is a certain smell. A smell of earth teeming with life just underneath its surface. It's going to bust! Yes, we had snow here in Sandy last night. But it was as if the snow was trying to make a last show of dominance, before retiring into inevitable submission.

10. I am happy for a loving and kind husband. He and I grew up in the same area, but never met until we both ended up here in Utah for the sake of our children. We've been through some hard patches, but those rough times are turning out to be just what the doctor ordered for a great marriage!

OK. I just can't make my list without this one last thing. So please humor me, if you will!

11. I am happy for my knowledge and belief in the Savior, Jesus Christ. He lives, you know. He is watching and waiting and hoping that we will turn to him and pray for his loving mercy and help. It is He is who I have leaned on in my times of great trial. He is why I am happy--even today!

My Take On Network and Multi-Level Marketing

2010-02-20T18:55:00.011-07:00

I have been a fan of network marketing since I was introduced to a company, some years ago. I loved their products and still do! I loved the fact that they were delivered to my door! I loved the fact that if I wanted to, I could attract other customers to their products and they would pay me a commission for having done so. I dabbled in the marketing side of this company for some of those years, got customers, got paid, still get paid, but I found that there was also a lot of opposition to network marketing, a lot of misconceptions. One common term I heard was "pyramid scheme". People associated network marketing, even Multi-level marketing with pyramid schemes. Maybe I was lucky. This was never the case with the company I associated with. Of course it is always good to check out a company's record, customer service rating, BBB rating, etc. but that is true with any company, not just MLM's..

Personally, I now buy regularly from at least 3 multi-level, network marketing organizations. Why? Because the products from these companies far out-weigh any that I might find in a regular supermarket or department store and at much more reasonable prices. The benefits I receive from their products increase the quality of my life and the life of my family members. It is very convenient and I consume these products on a regular basis. Plus there is always the built-in benefit of product recommendation. If I refer a customer to any one of the companies that I purchase from, the company will reward me monetarily. So I am not only getting quality products at a reasonable price, I am also receiving bonuses when I refer someone else. Network marketing is something that Proctor and Gamble has even started doing, in a limited fashion, because they have seen how powerful network marketing can be. Their limited bonus program gives mom's a few free products if they will refer potential customers to them.

Recently Network marketing has been touted the "Most powerful way to reach the end user" as quoted in Success magazine. We now have many companies like Microsoft, Coca Cola, IBM, Sharp, AT&T, Gillette, Texas Instruments and Colgate distributing their products via this Network Marketing system. These big companies are proof enough of the network marketing credibility and success. And within a few years, probably within the next 10 years, Network marketing industry will be distributing more services and products to the end user.

You will also see some of the most advanced, cutting edge products available to the consumer only by way of network marketing companies . Why is that? It is because they have spent more money in product development and research, using distributors who move these products by way of network marketing. They have cut out paying big advertisers, and some of them actually manufacture their own products, cutting out yet another expense.
We've all heard the extreme success stories of people who have received their golden ticket to life because of the money, time and quality of life they have gained through network marketing. Many people believe it's kind of like the lottery or they think that one can only make it big if you get in at the 'ground level'. They think that it could never happen to them and they better hold on to those dreary but dependable 9 to 5 jobs they trudge through every single day. But how dependable are these jobs nowadays? Where are they now? I've always believed that there is an opportunity for everyone somewhere in America, if you work hard enough and believe in yourself. I'm still optimistic about it, although I think that people really need to focus and work hard at what they believe in and not give up if it doesn't work at first.

Some advantages of Network Marketing Companies are:

Good quality products: Because these companies generally are able to cut costs on advertising, their products are very high quality. A good question to ask oneself is 'Would I still consume the products and services of this company even if there were no opportunity to market them? I have found the answer to be a resounding 'Yes!' in many circumstances.

Residual income: When you have customers that consume a product on a regular basis, and you get a portion of the profit, that is residual income!

No employees to hire: By far, this is a clear advantage over traditional businesses. An MLM affiliate program is a network of people independently working together.

Short commute: It is possible to build a business right from home! This industry gives you that added benefit, to be in business without employee concerns, yet having a network of independent business owners working together towards a common goal.

No (or low) inventory: Traditionally Network Marketing companies would have distributors stack up on inventory. This concept alone has given the industry a bad wrap for years. This is something that has changed. There are many companies that don't require any inventory - just a small portion each month that you use personally. I think that is a fair requirement, given the fact that you are paid a portion of the company profit for every time you refer someone as a customer and the fact that you are telling someone these products are worth consuming. Shouldn't you be the first example of that?

Modern technology can be used to operate your business, such as with:

· The Internet
· Drop Shipping Ability
· Consumer Leads
· Conference Lines
· Web Conference
· High Speed Internet Access

Low operating Costs: The network marketing model makes it possible to run a business at low costs compared to any other business model. With the advent of technology, we can do today what distributors 15 years ago could not do and that's to make our business portable.

With the advent of the cell phone, you can take your business and move it anywhere you like, at your convenience. So technically, you can be, for instance, watching your kid's soccer game, and be operating your business at full tilt! That would be multi-tasking to the max!

As long as you have access to the Internet via DSL or Cable, you can take your computer, your phone, and continue doing business while you are on the road, on vacation, or visiting relatives whether that be in another city or another country! It is not just the money, but the fulfillment of a lifestyle that makes an MLM Affiliate Program the best business to get in and your individual skills is what makes it happen, period!
As you can see, network marketing has many benefits. It frees up a lot of capital, because we eliminate retailers, wholesalers, warehouses, and the big advertising budget that business and industries normally spend thousand of dollars on. Money that is wasted in the traditional business can now be channeled into 2 main areas - the distributors of network marketing business and to product development and research. In other words, the little guy has a chance!

Tax Advantages: There are many tax benefits to operating a small business within your home, such as working as an independent distributor for an MLM Company. You are able to deduct many expenses that you have through operation of your business from your total income. For instance, you can in many instances deduct office space square footage, office equipment such as computer, phone, fax, copying, etc., business expenses such as lunch dates, gas mileage for trips, hotel expenses, gifts, etc. Even the cost of the personal products you purchase can be deducted if you can show that the purchase of these items is required for you to operate your business! (Consult your own tax specialist for verification!)

When someone comes to me and presents an idea or opportunity that is MLM in nature, I don't immediately turn on the red light, throw up the 'Do Not Solicit' Sign, and say 'not interested'. I give it at least 10 minutes before I decide that this may or may not be something I could use in my life. As a matter of fact, I'll go so far by saying MLM is as American as apple pie. This type of marketing works very well in the free enterprise system, and gives everyone a chance to benefit and succeed based on their needs, wants, and abilities, and of course, a little good old-fashioned luck!

So next time a friend of yours comes to you and says "Hey, I've got a great business with great products/services that you need to look at!" Give them a chance before you walk away!

Feckless and Vapid - words I don't hear a lot!

2010-02-07T22:06:00.003-07:00

The two words above are words that are seldom used, but I think they sound so interesting. I am going to attempt to use them in this post. I have no idea what I will post about.

Let's see, today was the Super Bowl. I really was against the majority in that I wanted to see Payton Manning and The Colts win. I just kind of like him. I'm sure I'll have plenty of time to get to like Drew Breese. I also like Austin Collie, who is a first year Colts receiver, just over from BYU, my hometown college team! The first quarter looked really promising for the Colts. A touchdown and no answer from The Saints except a field goal. But then the momentum changed and I felt it. That is something I'm good at. I can feel which team has got the momentum going for it at about the middle of the 2nd quarter. I tend to lose interest after that if my team doesn't have it going on by then. Of course, there are always the rare surprises, so in the important games, I'll hang around for the whole thing. I pretty much watched the whole thing this evening, if only for the commercials and the food that was prepared, mainly by moi!

I think that the E*Trade Commercials are hands-down the best ones, making a lot of those $2 million commercials look dull and vapid in comparison. Those little man babies are adorable! I seriously think my husband should look like one of those babies, because he acts so much like a baby sometimes, (especially when he has a widdle cowd or needs praise or sympathy). You know I love you, honey, and I have plenty of both praise and sympathy to give you (along with my most welcome constructive comments that you love so much)!

Yes, unfortunately, the mighty Colts offense turned into a feckless attempt to turn around a hungry and focused New Orleans Saints team. Drew Breese, who some felt was another gun-slingin' (think Brett Favre), quarterback who makes sometimes desperate pass attempts that are at times intercepted, turned out to tie a super bowl record, making 32 pass completions, the same as the Patriot's Tom Brady in Super Bowl 2003 against the Carolina Panthers. Not too shabby!

Well there you have it. My attempt to use within my post two interesting words that I don't hear too often! Try it sometime! Pick a couple of words that you think are unusual and then just start writing. It can be a real shake-up to your writing style! It's also quite fun! Let me know if you get some interesting results!

Emily Dickinson

2010-01-18T15:24:00.002-07:00

I have been rather interested in poetry since I was old enough to realize that my grandmother, Helen Livingston, was a published poet. She taught HS English forever and a day (thirty years at least), and once I even accompanied her to school where I received a lot of welcome attention from her students. One day soon I will post some of her poetry. I think it is really wonderful and worth saving. But today, I want to focus on another poet--Emily Dickinson. I have read some of her poetry and I love most of it. I found that she could be rather dark and she wrote about death a lot, but in a beautiful, dark sort of way.
_____________________________

Well, I was right about the death part! I have just come back from Wikapedia and she certainly was preoccupied with death, largely because she experienced a lot of it in her lifetime and it had an effect on her. While she was alive, her poetry wasn't known and before she died, she made her sister promise to burn all of her poetry. Thankfully, that didn't happen and while less than a dozen of her poems were known while she was alive, nearly 1800 poems were discovered after her demise.

I like this one:

If I can stop one heart from breaking,
I shall not live in vain;
If I can ease one life the aching,
Or cool one pain,
Or help one fainting robin
Unto his nest again,
I shall not live in vain.

And this one:

I had been hungry all the years-
My noon had come, to dine-
I, trembling, drew the table near
And touched the curious wine.

'T was this on tables I had seen
When turning, hungry, lone,
I looked in windows, for the wealth
I could not hope to own.

I did not know the ample bread,
'T was so unlike the crumb
The birds and I had often shared
In Nature's dining-room.

The plenty hurt me, 't was so new,--
Myself felt ill and odd,
As berry of a mountain bush
Transplanted to the road.

Nor was I hungry; so I found
That hunger was a way
Of persons outside windows,
The entering takes away.

This particular poem tells me that sometimes a person doesn't realize what they have because they want what they don't have and so never really appreciate what they've had all along. Sometimes I think that is what winning the lottery would be like. I'd win a million bucks and try to go out and spend it and realize that I just am not that happy with what that million bucks could get. I know, I know....money isn't happiness, but it sure helps out a lot.

This next one makes me wonder if she is speaking of one of her dear friends that she lost to death. Her autobiography at Wikapedia talks about the principal of her school, Amherst Academy Director, Leonard Humphrey, who died unexpectedly while she attended there. She apparently idolized him and thought the world of him. Maybe she is possibly talking about him in this verse, just a guess:

God permit industrious angels
Afternoons to play.
I met one, -- forgot my school-mates,
All, for him, straightaway.

God calls home the angels promptly
At the setting sun;
I missed mine. How dreary marbles,
After playing the Crown!

At any rate, I know I've only just scratched the surface of the works of this poet, but what beautiful language she uses to help us visualize the feelings in her heart! I'm just glad that someone didn't honor her dying wishes!

One Thing, That's For Sure

2010-01-03T21:38:00.002-07:00

Since the New Year has arrived, an interesting thing has happened to me.

Let me just preface that by saying that the months of November and December were months of high's and low's for me in terms of mood and outlook. Of course there were the Christmas and Thanksgiving holidays that I'm sure I enjoyed just as much as everyone else. But then there were the dark, dismal days of winter, with thick cloud cover, heavy and opressive air quality, and much shortened days. Those days put me into a major funk and I felt that I, like a falling boulder, was hurtling into an abyss into which I would crash and never come out of. I felt like I was suffocating under a blanket of fog. I blamed myself for not being productive, being un-motivated, having a lack of desire to do much of anything. It definitely sounds like depression, doesn't it? Who me? Nah.....Total denial. I even posted one day on Facebook - "Help! I'm succumbing to winter's icy grip."

But then came the week of the New Year and bam! Back in the saddle for me. There was a little bit of sun, a new outlook, I found out that my weight was 2 lbs. better than at this time last year! (Woo hoo! For me, that's amazing!) Anyway, with the New Year comes my new set of challenges to myself to see if I can do them. I'm pretty sure that I can do at least some of them. So why not? I think teh New Year is a great time to recommit and move forward. So with that...here is at least one thing I want to accomplish.

I picked a new background to remind me of my one desired, dear-to-my-heart committment for 2010. I WILL be playing the violin this year. It has been several years since I have played. I think the last time I played was in church for Easter Sunday in 2007. I have a knack of doing something and then not doing it for a really long time afterwards or maybe even never again.

I know it's been like that for me with crafts. I once was an avid sewer, making all of my own dresses and sewing costumes for my son for Halloween. My mentor was Sheri Lester, who was so, so talented! She would always answer my silly questions and just encourage me. And then I moved. I didn't move my whole household. Just myself. I left the sewing machine behind. I left it behind, along with the life I left behind. No more dresses made by me.

There was the knitting phase. I learned how to knit on circular knitting needles. I did it well enough that I made a complete sweater, sort of like this one pictured. I gave it to my sister and that was that. I've done that with crocheting, cross-stitching, needlepoint, basket-weaving (that was my major at BYU), and embroidery. But I'm OK with that, I'm of the belief that at least I have tried and completed something in all these areas and at some point, maybe even in another existence, I will have the opportunity to expand and create beautiful things that stem from the knowledge I gleaned at some point in my life. How's that for rationalization?

But the violin has got to be another matter. I had played for years and I will play it again. I love the sound, the expressive nature, I love the beauty of the instrument in every way. What I will do is find a teacher who will bring me back to the old habits that I need in order to play well. I'm sure that my playing has gone way down. I will have to get the callouses back onto my fingers again and I will have to get into that groove of practice everyday. I know that music is a jealous mistress. You can't just leave her for a long while and expect to return without serious consequences. So I will humbly return and take my lashes, pay the price and then feel the gratifying rewards of being able to play beautiful music.

So let the New Year come, ring out the old and ring in the new! I'm ready for 2010!

What's UP with the English Language?

2010-01-03T21:14:00.000-07:00

I got this from a blogger who got it from someone else, whom she didn't reference. So listen up.

The word up, meaning toward the sky or at the top of the list, but when we awaken in the morning, why do we wake up? At a meeting why does a topic come up? Why do we speak up, why are officers up for election, and why is it up to the secretary to write up a report?

We call up our friends, brighten up a room, polish up the silver, warm up the leftovers and clean up the kitchen. We lock up the house and fix up the old car.

People stir up trouble, line up for tickets work up an appetite, and think up excuses. To be dressed is one thing, but to be dressed up is special.

A drain must be opened up when it is stopped up. We open up a store in the morning and close it up at night. When the sky becomes gray, we say it's clouding up, but when the sun comes up we say it's clearing up. When it rains it messes things up.

We seem to be pretty mixed up about up. Maybe we should look it up in the dictionary. In a desk-sized dictionary, up takes up almost 1/4 of the page and can add up to about 30 definitions. If you are up to it, try building up a list of the uses of up. It will take up a lot of your time. But don't give up.

I could go on but I'll wrap it up. My time is up, so I'll shut up.

How Many Times...

2009-12-18T19:20:00.004-07:00

...have I Told You Not To Eat Straight Out of The Carton?

And So This Is Christmas!

2009-12-17T22:18:00.019-07:00

Some of The Highlights of Christmas For Me This year have been:

--Singing with 'Friends And Neighbors' Christmas Group. This was my first year doing so and my job was accompanist. We performed for several RS dinners, some care centers, a private party and our Fireside. I heard them the previous year sing for our Relief Society Dinner and I thought they were wonderful and how unselfish they were to donate their time during this busy season. It turned out to be a real blessing for me. We were able to perform for my friend Viktoriya, who had suffered a traumatic head injury in April of '09 and who now lives in a care center in Murray. I know it brightened her existence. I loved performing for the Relief Societies. I felt like a Relief Society Dinner Crasher when we went to those because we always got fed and it was always so delicious.

--Making goodies and delivering them to several friends around the neighborhood. We didn't do as much this year as last year, but Greg and I always have fun doing this together each year. I'm so lucky that he likes to participate in this tradition. I made 2 of my favorites and Greg made 2 of his. People usually like Greg's because he experiments and does really gourmet things like peanut butter candy, Merry Cranberry Cookies, cheescake cookies,etc. Mine are more traditional favs like miniature banana muffins and good 'ol Oatmeal Choco chip cookies. Maybe next year I'll make my Grandmother's roll-out sugar cookies, a recipe from the early 1900's.

--Setting up and enjoying our Christmas Village. Each year we get a couple new pieces to add and it is fun to look at it throughout the Christmas holiday.

--Getting together with my family, whom I love more and more as the years go by. Families are just wonderful. They just assume you will spend time with them on special holidays. There was a time when I couldn't spend so many holidays or times with them. I lived all the way across the country with small children and it was many times just too difficult to come to them or them to me. So I'm grateful for this blessing in my life now. I have pictured here my sister, Laura, and our niece, Riley Bresock

--I enjoyed looking at the many lights and decorations that people put up in honor of the season. Since we haven't done much to the outside of our home, except to put up a few token lights around the door and our funny little snowman, I enjoy and appreciate the time others put in to gladden my heart and please my eye, reminding me constantly that this is a special time of year.

--My sons aren't here this year for Christmas. I spent last Christmas with them and it was so great. But Eddie and Joseph will be in Orlando this year at Disney World. I am trying not to be jealous, failing a little bit, but was so glad that Eddie thought of me before he left. He took me out to lunch and we had a great time. He's such a great son and I appreciate him so much.

--The address/talk that touched me the most this year was one by Didier F. Uchdorf at the Annual Christmas Fireside. It made so much sense to me! But there were so many other Christmas messages that touched my heart and brought renewed love for the Savior and a determination to be a little better throughout the coming year.

--Making little Christmas ornaments with my sister-in-law, Alicia. She is the most creative person I know and so I glommed onto her this Christmas as we made some cute little crafts for people we love.

--As I made my last Grocery Stop before the family Christmas get together, there was the cutest little boy, no more than 5 years old, recruited to play all the Christmas songs in his beginner Christmas piano book, sitting at a piano right at the entrance of Macey's in Sandy. It was so adorable. He was oblivious to anything but his assignment of plowing through those Christmas songs and he was trying to do it lickity split. Who knows what kind of reward his mother had promised him at the end of his mission. But he played with gusto and enthusiasm, his little fingers barely reaching the full chords he needed to play. My heart just melted, as I know what a task it might have been to get him to do this in the first place. I know that once I persuaded Eddie to play in a recital in his younger years and it was so adorable. But I was not able to do it again!

--I loved being able to Tivo some select Christmas programs and watch them at my leisure throughout the holiday. The music during Christmas is like no other time and it was just such a pleasure to listen and watch.

--One day during this season, Greg left me a cute and welcome surprise at my desk:

--I watched my Dad in Sandy, Utah get showered by friends and neighbors all the way through Christmas with treats, presents and good deeds. Since I stay there two or three days in the week, it was really fun to see what was left at the door each day. Wow! He got the 12 days of Christmas by an annonymous family. From friends and neighbors, plates of goodies came in regularly. I couldn't wait to see what the new day would bring. Neighbors on both sides of him shoveled his walks when it snowed and just asked him if there was anything they could do. If this isn't the spirit of Christmas, I don't know what it would be.

There were many other things that just brought a smile to my face during this wonderful time of year. I am grateful I was able to stop for a few moments and just take in the simple joys and pleasure of the Christmas Season. I hope you were able to do the same!

Stephanie Meyers' Appeal

2009-11-29T11:09:00.018-07:00

I first heard about a book called 'Twilight' when I was substituting at Dixon Middle School. I noticed a commotion in the library among a few female students and a teacher. They were animatedly talking about something, although I wasn't sure what. Then I saw one of the girls holding a book and they were all pointing at it and I knew it was this particular book that was causing the commotion. As soon as I got a chance, I inquired about the book and found that it was called 'Twilight' and that not only students were very interested in it, but the teachers and parents as well. I got a copy as soon as possible, and continued on through the series, waiting with baited breath until the next books came out.

I loved the series, but became aware of a backlash of sorts by certain groups of people and as I tried to understand their concerns, I really came to understand more about human nature and fear of the unknown, fear of change, and jealousy. So I am voicing what I have found to be my truth about this series and about this author.

Stephanie Meyer was a literature major, not a writer. She makes no bones about the fact that she was just an ordinary stay-at-home mom before she came upon her literary success. She doesn't claim that she was an experienced or acclaimed writer. She simply acted on a dream about one of the chapters and went from there, keeping things away from her husband at first, because she wasn't sure what he might think of her writing. She used her writing as an outlet from the humdrums of motherhood and there are many of them, to go along with the major rewards. There are undoubtedly many many fans of her work. She has had unprecedented success in the literary world and now the film industry. This is undoubtedly very puzzling for many a seasoned writer, many who have been at it for years and years, with not even a fraction of the success that she has swept up, in this her first series. For example, there are the well-meaning, albeit slightly self-righteous Mormon (of whom Stephanie Meyers is one) critics, who would have had her swiftly stripped of her church membership but had to be satisfied only with the removal of her books from Deseret Books, for her blasphemy of talking about vampires, traditionally associated with the occult, and with insinuating that young people have sexual urges--how dare she--these things should not be talked about so blatently! Wake up and smell the green jello my friends, this is kindergarten fare compared to what every kid in Mormondom is exposed to. Then there are the published authors, even NYT Bestselling authors. They say that her literary style is awkward, obviously amateur, stilted and non-descriptive. Apparently Stephen King expressed the greatest disdain for Stephanie Meyers--and what? He must think that stooping to blatent descriptions of terror, gore, sex and violence is great literary form. They may be literary, I wouldn't even know. But I know that books like his have helped our society descend to such levels of depravity, heretofore unknown. It's called pushing the envelope just a little further.

What Stephanie has hit on is a theme that is rarely, if ever, explored. Especially in a secular setting. It lies mainly with the extraordinary character of Edward. Here is the world of what has formerly been known as evil, mysterious and full of self-gratification and she has singled out a group of vampires, who for the most part have managed to quell these urges for the greater good, so as to live in peace with their fellow earthly inhabitants. They have totally controlled their natural instincts, and the most extreme example is Edward, who although he still has these urges, totally buries them in order to show Bella that he loves her and not only just loves her, but will put her life, comfort and happiness before his own. In a less primary role is Jacob, who also displays some of these characteristics as he becomes more involved in Bella's life. What? Men who actually think beyond the next paycheck, the next meal, the next romp in the hay? Wow! The ones who do that kind of thing are mothers--they have their children under great duress, sacrifice for their children, do for their children and families and live for their families and others. Mothers would give their own lives for their children and those they love. Women are taught to be future mothers and they have this kind of mindset. Not that some men aren't doing these things, but all of these things at once? I really think it blows a lot of womens' minds to think a man thinks beyond certain stereotypical things.

But wait--haven't we all been told that we need to control the natural man in order to keep our second estate? Now I'm sure I've lost every non-LDS reader at this point. That's OK. That's why Stephanie Meyer is here--to bring back to recall, in wonderful, easy-to-understand story form! She has brought the main point of human existence to light in a way that is easy to swallow, non-religious, yet so familiar to so many in so many ways. We came here to earth to bring our own natural, temporal, human tendencies under subjection to our spirits. We came here to change the "creatures" that we are to more refined and God-like beings. If we are successful here, we will progress to greater levels. Isn't that essentially what Edward did? I really feel like this is why this series has such universal appeal. And the fact that it was written to young people, before they are covered over with the unfortunate crust of cynicsm. Maybe, just maybe, it will raise some young person's eye to the fact that you really can overcome this life, in its many forms of darkness, despair, discouragment and destruction. Or maybe they will just have a great read!

Whatever the reason that people read the series, I'm sure that Stephanie Meyer felt like she dreamed a silly dream and was just writing it down as an outlet. But what was her driving force behind writing the whole book and then the series? Was she looking to make a ton of money as an author? Not even! She wasn't even a writer. She didn't even know if she should be doing it, hence the initial hiding of the manuscript from her husband. There was only one person who even gave her book a thumbs up for publishing, and that is who she went with. Whatever the reason she decided to write these books, I feel like the world is a better place because of them!

Growing In Marriage - Jesse & LuAnn Crisler

2009-11-13T21:08:00.004-07:00

I went to Stake Women's Conference all the way back in June of this year and meant to write out the notes from one of the classes there. It was such a great class about marriage. I never got them typed out, but did save the program on the back of which I wrote some notes. The Crisler's are very musically talented people. Both are accomplished singers and one or both of them sing in the Tab. They attended Julliard School of Music which is where they met. At the time, Sister Crisler was not LDS. They gave 10 observations about marriage that they felt had helped their own through the years.

1. Forget the gender roles that are traditionally assigned to men and women. Do what works, be a helpmeet.

2. Avoid saying "It's your turn". Remember that it won't always work 50/50. Sometimes you are giving more and sometimes you are taking more. It always works out in the end.

3. Don't compare your marriage to others. Everyone has their own individual positive and negative aspects in their marriages, some which aren't visible to the public eye. Just work on improving and appreciating your own marriage.

4. Never mention divorce. It will breed a monster. Once that boundary is crossed, it is easy to go there again and again.

5. Never say, "If you love me, you would...." That is a form of control and no one likes to feel controlled in a relationship.

6. Realize, know and appreciate that you will always have differences. Clarify these constantly. Learn to work with them and make them a win/win for both of you.

7. Always compromise. "Good marriages take work--better ones take even more work."

8. Keep the romance alive. Do things that you both enjoy that help you feel closer to one another.

9. Your marriage is your own. Don't tattle to other people about each other. People never forget what you tell them and how it makes them feel toward your spouse. Often it comes back to bite you.

10. Never forget your activity in the church. Make it your cornerstone in everything you do. It will enhance so many aspects of your marriage, including your children and extended family. Remember that missing just 2 Sundays leads to inactivity.

Okay, those are the notes I had on the paper. There were great examples and stories also given along with these. They did a great job and I thoroughly enjoyed this class. Now I can throw away the program I had been saving all this time.

I'm A Disc Golf Chick

2009-10-08T18:12:00.006-06:00

I like disc golf. I like my husband for introducing it to me. He bought me the bag, the discs, and I actually know what over-stable and under-stable are and a few other choice terms.

Greg is the most urgent and intense driver (of discs). He can chuck those puppies over 350 ft. When I watch them,they look like birds in flight, rising up and down with the wind. Just last night, he placed 2nd in doubles. This is no small feat since he is the old man of the bunch. One comment that was made was, "Wow! For an old man, you have a hell of an arm."

I must tell you, he thinks I'm a heck of a putter, too. Whenever I make a nice putt, especially in front of a bunch of guys, he starts talking to me in ways that to the normal ear, may sound dirty. But it's actually a lot of disc golf phrases strung together with "my wife" in there somewhere. I have a slight hearing problem and sometimes it is hard to distinguish between consonants, like p and b. But I have no problem distinguishing between those two vowels when we're out playing. It is ALWAYS "nice putt."

Seriously, ladies, disc golf with your man is fun. You're out in a beautiful park, the weather is nice (but not necessarily), you're getting fresh air and exercise, quality time with the hubby, etc. etc. If I was single, I'd take up disc golf, for sure, as a strategy. There are hardly any good women players out there and single, athletic guys aplenty. Greg tells me about some of those he meets. Airline pilots, CEO's of small companies, millionaires, you name it. Heck, Greg plays with a certain BYU quaterback's dad and some of his friends. Of course, there are also the pot heads and nerds.

Sometimes I'll see guys out introducing the sport to their dates or girlfriends. I have to laugh at times. The girl will be wearing a flowing dress or flip flops or a halter top, her hair perfectly coifed. She looks like she needs to be mall shopping or something. The thing that she feels is most important is to look beautiful for her man. And then she throws. It is embarrassingly unwieldy, but the guy gallantly compliments her and urges her on. Hopefully, she will be persistent and the guy will be patient. If so, she will have it made and she doesn't even know it! I think it's fun to see families playing together. One time there was a couple playing, with baby stroller in tow. He was obviously a player and I assumed she was along for the outing, not necessarily the playing. Then came her turn. She let loose a throw that outdid mine by a few feet and she wasn't even trying. By the time their little guy gets to be three, he'll be a player for sure. The other day I saw a little guy tagging along with his player dad and possibly his grandpa. He wss carrying his own disc. I thought, "how cute, the little guy might be out of his element trying to keep up with the big boys." But no, this little guy was a bonefied player and he let those discs rip. So there are a lot of little disc golf virtuosos coming up the pipe.

Greg taught me how to play. It used to be that every time I made a throw, there he'd be, with another and another suggestion. "Please, just let me throw and enjoy my time here!", I'd say. I really didn't care how many feet my disc went or if I made the basket in 4 or 8 tries. So he'd let up for awhile until he just couldn't stand it and there come the comments and coaching once again. He's a lot better now....because I'm a lot better now! I may even enter my first tournament next year. And tomorrow he is playing a tournament in Ogden. We're trying it out today though.

A Tribute To Daisy

2009-10-02T17:14:00.003-06:00

Daisy was my border collie. We got her as a pup and she was the last one in the litter, blue-eyed, sweet-tempered, and mischievous. For 6 years we had her and those 6 years were all the better for it. Why? Just her presence. She wasn't a licker. She wasn't a barker. But she loved affection and showed affection. I loved the adoring way that she looked at me when I was busy doing something else. I loved the way she anticipated going on a walk with me and trying to be patient while I rounded up all the things I needed. I loved how she refused to put a space between myself and her when I was hiking with anyone else but her. She would always always take her place directly in front of me. I loved how I never ever had to worry about aggressive behavior toward anyone as I was out doing my thing in a park, on a trail or on the road.

In early August of this year, I got a comment that she was looking thin. I had never really noticed, because we fed her well. I thought that the reason she turned down her food is that she was hot and just wanted to keep the fat off for coolness' sake. But it got me to wondering. I started watching her and noticed that she wasn't as energetic as she should be. Soon I really noticed it, especially after taking her to a dog park in Sandy and all of the dogs there ran heads and tails all over her. She was really a sedate little dog. And then the kicker. She collapsed on her legs. I saw it, it was ever so little, she got right back up, but no, this wasn't good. She was at the vet a couple days later. Well, after a few hundred dollars, we found out the diagnosis. I worried about heart worms. I know that dogs get them back east. That proved to be unfounded, since there are only a handful of cases here in Utah. But it was just as, if not more serious. She had Lymphoma. It is a very aggressive form of cancer that dogs can get. After that, she declined so rapidly that it was astounding. I have never seen anything progress so quickly. We put her down 4 days ago. She was sweet to the very end and I'm glad that she saw her family surrounding her those very last moments. I will always think of Daisy as my little sweetheart. Believe it or not, we already have another border collie. Her name is Evie and she is 10 months old. She has a few issues and needs a bit of rehabilitation. She has taken to Greg immediately. She and I haven't hit it off so well. I really miss Daisy. We'll see how this goes. Time will only tell.

Wounded - Not Beyond Repair

2009-07-16T15:10:00.013-06:00

My soul took a casualty, a major beatdown.....again. Certainly not the first!
It came out of nowhere and shook me to the core.
And yet, in a strange way it was also an answer to my prayers.

My weather-beaten, battle-scarred soul has yet another deep cut, etched out of sorrow and sin. Is it worth the pain? Is peace, tranquility and serene preparation grounds for someone else, someone else indeed, a fitting trade? (I didn't know I was the one who would have to pay...)
That's OK.

This tough, calloused, bruised soul has taken hits before and of this, at least, I'm sure. I'll come out yet again in triumph.....even more in debt and humble gratitude
to Him who conquered all.

Born On The 4th Of July

2009-07-04T15:52:00.013-06:00

Today is my son, Eddie's birthday.

It seemed so funny at the time that he should be born today, a national holiday. But as I've seen him grow and mature, I've come to think how really appropriate that he was born on this day. He is the most patriotic person I know and he loves his country and would do anything to defend it.

The only thing more important than being a part of the Armed Forces is being a part of the Lord's army, serving as a missionary. Even that has been delayed and has made him wait for awhile. And I'm OK with this. I know that the timetable of the Lord sometimes isn't our own. Some of us have to wait, for whatever reason. I know it isn't easy for Eddie to wait, but he is and has been doing it with grace. Today he offhandedly told me that he might be on the big screen at 'Stadium of Fire'. Earlier this year, he had been with his BYU Air Force ROTC Unit at Hill AFB, welcoming incoming soldiers from Iraq tours of duty. They randomly selected some of the cadets to describe what it means to them when they see the flag. I know he said something short, succinct and to the point. That is how he is. But it would have been good. I wish I had known that, because I would have been sitting in that Stadium tonight, even though I'm not a Jonas Brothers fan. But as it is, we will be celebrating with our family, such as it is, tonight. Simple, that's how Eddie has always liked it. That's not such a bad thing in this day and age of over-the-top entertainment and revelry. I've always known that Eddie is a stronger, more valiant spirit than I ever was. He knows what he needs to do and just does it, regardless of the unpleasantness or how he is feeling. He has the self-discipline to avoid things that aren't good for him--like too many helpings of dinner on Sunday or spending all kinds of money on cars, bikes and entertainment and instead using it on his mission.

Who would have known that on that 4th of July 21 years ago one of God's truly valiant warriors would be coming to my arms to stay awhile. Not for too long, really. Just long enough to get the basics so he could continue on his way. But what a privilege it has been for me. Happy birthday, Eddie. I love you.

Viktoriya, My Teacher, My Friend Part II

2009-06-22T17:41:00.015-06:00

Viktoriya's lessons weren't cheap, by Provo standards. We paid $120.00/month. But really, her knowledge of the middle-eastern culture and her expertise in dance and choreography were worth much more. The choreographies that we learned from her were authentic, artistic and meaningful. As our lessons progressed we moved from the gym, to her own little studio that Dave built for her, to Noah's in Lindon, to another home with another studio. We never stayed stationary for very long and sometimes it was really hard to get a continuity of what we were trying to learn. Often she would start on a choreography with us and then become distracted because of a show she would be preparing for or a photo shoot or personal problems with her own family. After all, she was adjusting to a totally new country, new language, new customs, new family structure, new faith, new friends, new everything. This takes time and she was trying her best to fit in the best way that she could, trying to make everyone happy, including herself. Sometimes it was more than she could handle. But when she was able to give us her absolute, full attention, it was well worth it. The cboreographies were amazing and we were so lucky to be called her dancers.

Throughout this time, I learned that she had a very fiery temperament and sometimes she would manifest it in word and gestures and Russian expressions. She would often halt our lessons to vent about an issue she felt strongly about. Once she gave us a detailed description of life in Russia and the culture there. It took about an hour. Did we say anything? After all, we were paying for dance, not a cultural dissertation on Russia. No, we just ate it up and listened to every enthralling detail. Another time, she told us exactly what she felt about Utah culture. Viktoriya is very metropolitan and she felt that Utah is so provincial in many ways. She definitely loved the area for the protection it offered to her girls and the good religious values around her. But she also felt that there was a bit of close-mindedness as well. Those of us in the class heard her talk about this and although many of us were native Utahns and we love our state and our way of life, many of us could relate. She talked about how many of the women in the LDS church were raised to be so careful sexually that they were even restrictive in their own relationships with their husbands and thus the reason why many of the men here stray into deviant, secretive lifestyles. She told us, "Don't be afraid to be a woman! Show your femininity and be proud of it. You don't have to be loose to do this. " She told us of how men in her ward would make passes at her, unprovoked by her, and that she didn't like it at all.

She had great charity because of the experiences she had lived through. Once she had a special class about nutrition, all compliments of her. She talked about her experiences with the fast food and convenience foods here in America and told about the ill effects this food can have on women, especially. She showed us alternative ways in which to cook, eat and prepare food. She had us taste things she had cooked. It was so very interesting and although I'm sure most of the women couldn't put everything she told us into effect, we certainly took away some things that benefited our lives. I know I did. I gained a renewed appreciation for the nutritional value of raw fruits and vegetables and how bad the white breads are. Viktoriya called white bread "white death". I have to agree wholeheartedly. She was an avid gardener. She had an amazing variety of vegetables in her garden, which she cared for herself.

Because of the many experiences she had throughout her life, she had a lot of charity for people of all races and religions. I have never seen anyone embrace all different kinds of people in every class so readily as Viktoriya did. The only prerequisite for you to be her friend was that you were able to appreciate her and accept her for what she was, listen to her and be available to help her sometimes. For some, that was a tall order. But for many of us, it was a privilege and an honor. She spoke of one day being able to go to the temple and there be sealed to her husband and her precious daughters.

She desired tolerance from others--here was a woman from a totally different culture, trying to assimilate into the American, LDS, Utah culture, to the best of her ability. She just wanted to be seen for the good that she did and for the people around her to give her peace. There came a time when she separated from her husband, Dave. She moved into another neighborhood. She was very low on finances and needed to support herself. She took in some boarders, who were a bi-racial LDS couple. The woman was from Russia, like herself and the man was black. They were married and quite happy, but she received a lot of harrassment from the neighbors. They called the Housing Authorities on her for having renters. She had lessons in her small studio. They called the city for that. She never got any peace or understanding from these LDS neighbors, who smiled sweetly to her to her face, but then turned around and backstabbed her. She felt like her visiting teachers were a sort of gestappo, trying to figure out what her status was so that they could report her and gossip about her.

Her husband, Dave, turned out to be a user and a manipulator and he was terrible to her. He blackmailed her, he lied to her, and he made false promises to her. His family was very intolerant of her and her daughter. Her feelings toward Utah and members of the LDS church turned sour. Many of us were so sympathetic but we wouldn't go so far as to deny the truthfulness of the Gospel and the reality of the plan of Salvation, the Book of Mormon and the prophet Joseph Smith. I told her that the people weren't perfect, but the plan was.

She eventually moved to SLC, where she had a position with the Utah Ballet Conservatory as a teacher and where she was nearer to film and modeling opportunities. She continued to teach middle eastern dance and perform at weddings and competitions. Her name was only getting bigger. Her birthday came around and she turned 39. She felt a sense of urgency to establish a solid reputation in a business where youth and physical beauty were the top selling commodities. She needed to establish security for her two daughters.

Then the fateful day in the middle of April. She was going down the road with a million things on her mind. She was still in a new country, learning a new language, learning new customs, with new people, surroundings.....and traffic patterns. She didn't see the light turn yellow, then red. She ran straight through it and her little white Toyota was hit by an oncoming van. She was rushed to the hospital with extensive internal and head injuries. Oddly enough, not one bone was broken and no external injuries were incurred. But Viktoriya was gravely injured. She lay in a coma as the surgeons tried to help her. They shaved her beautiful hair. That was a tragedy all in itself. But she was unaware of anything that was going on around her. It has been 2 1/2 months since that horrible accident. She now lays in a care facility, still in a coma.

I have been to visit my friend. She doesn't recognize me. She lays there day after day. I wonder what will happen to her beautiful daughters. One of them is left parentless and the other will most likely be raised by her estranged husband's family. One thing I do know--she has a most beautiful spirit and had so much to overcome in this life. Maybe Heavenly Father has taken her into his arms and rescued her from the grasp of the world, to teach her of His ways, to surround her with His love, and to give her a peace that she never could know otherwise. Somehow I know that He will not leave Viktoriya alone. She has done too much good and has too much love for others. I am grateful for this and grateful for His love and mercy. So rest, Viktoriya, and learn, even in this state of limbo. Your destiny is one of greatness. I love you.

Viktoriya, My Teacher, My Friend (Part I)

2009-06-19T19:19:00.013-06:00

I'd
been hearing about a Viktoriya for awhile from one friend of mine and then from another friend of mine. So when I was invited to "try out" one of her classes, I decided to do so with some trepidition. I do have some dance background. I took ballet as a little girl for about 4 years and that effect is still with me to this day--I can do full splits and am very limber. I was in a Modern Dance Group in HS called Culliver's Choreographers and in Jr. College, I took an advanced Modern Dance Class where we did a few choreographies there. So I felt like I wasn't totally a duck out of water going to "Middle Eastern Dance." The class was in a small gym on Canyon Rd by Day's Market. When I got there Viktoriya greeted me and had me start right in on their class. My first impression of her was "foreign", with a heavy Russian accent, quite pretty and very sweet, almost solicitous in her friendliness. They did bar work, about an hour and then moved into the dance technique part. The bar work was really easy for me, because of the dance experience I had. No sweat! (Wrong expression, yes, I did sweat, but it was all do-able for me and didnt put me out of commission afterwards.) Then came the technique. Not so easy. I didn't realize hips and belly could move that way and it was difficult to get them to do even a little of what she was asking us to do. Then one of her "intermediate" students, from her dance group came in. She started practicing in front of the mirror. I thought, "I could never shimmy or move like this person, ever." That's when my inner challenge knocked on the door of my pride. I decided to give it a try. I worked with Viktoriya for about a year, taking lessons about once a week, and am happy to say that I was able to work enough so that I conquered the moves that I at first thought were so difficult! I actually had new people comment to me on how they didn't think they could ever do those moves and how I was such a pro. (Yeah, right!) It was through the great teaching of Viktoriya that I was able to conquer these moves. Sadly I thought she'd be around forever!

Viktoriya is an extremely interesting person. Born and raised in the Ukraine to a "family of Doctors", ranging from a mother who was a psychiatrist to aunts and uncles who were all very well educated and trained in their professions, Viktoriya started out early in her education. The Russian Education system is nothing like our own. She was sent to school and in Russia, dance training is mandatory. The teachers in Russi are very strict and to berate a student in front of the class is perfectly accepted and normal. In dance class, teachers stroll around with canes and tap or even hit students if they aren't in perfect form. Those students accept this and don't take out major lawsuits, etc. It always amazed Viktoriya about the lack of respect American students show their teachers...

Those few dance students that make the cut are sent to more advanced training and from that advanced training is where the prima ballerinas are found and sent to the professional schools of ballet. There is no ballet in the world like Russian Ballet, known for its perfect form and discipline. Viktoriya was one of those talented ones who was sent on to the advanced training. But she had no desire to be a prima donna in the Russian Ballet. Thus she didn't put in the required hours to do that, as I will explain later.

Another thing that Viktoriya was amazing at, was the piano. Her mother made sure that she had the opportunity to have lessons with the finest teachers available. She became a concert pianist at a very young age. She has shown me what she was able to do. She played a little bit of Beethoven's Moonlight Sonata for me, and it was stunning. She talked about practicing 4 - 5 hours each day on her piano. To me, the discipline she had was amazing.

But alas, Viktoriya didn't want the disciplined life of a concert pianist or a prima ballernina or a doctor or some such profession. She was a beautiful girl with a lot of life and personality. She left home and lived in Moscow and partied! She talked of nights of fun and dancing and drinking and just major good times. Viktoriya probably would have settled down and come back home to continue some sort of career and all. But she got married and had her 1st daughter. This marriage was a disaster. Suffice it to say, she landed in the hospital with serious injuries at one point with this marriage.

Then the economy went bust in Russia and pretty much through most of Europe. Some girls, who were good dancers, travelled to the Middle East and became bellydancers, to make money. Some of them did OK and some became famous, making a boatload of money. Viktoriya became famous and made a boatload of money. She danced at major hotels, did parties, made videos and really became quite a commodity. She learned the culture of the Middle East and she learned that bellydancing is not cheap and tawdry, when done in the right atmosphere. There is absolute beauty in it and long tradition behind it. Bellydancers do have their place in society, however. As she established herself in Lebbanon and other places, she became famous. For several years she was the lover of a University President. She wanted so much to marry him. But he wouldn't, because she was a bellydancer. The best she could hope for was to be his mistress.

She ended up back in Ukraine for awhile...until she met Dave, from Provo, UT, her ticket to America. He was visiting Ukraine and met Viktoriya. They fell in love and he brought her back to Provo in 2002. Bellydancing was in the past. She became pregnant and had her little girl. She lived a very humble life. She had some health problems, she gained a lot of weight. She became resigned to a humble life. But then, she danced for Dave. He was blown away! Never had Provo Dave seen such a thing. He begged her to start dancing again. He knew that she could make a name for herself if she did. So slowly, she started eating the foods she knew she needed to eat in order to gain health back. One of the things that so appalled her when she first came to America was the food. Apparently, Dave was more than enthusiastic about introducing fast food and convenience food to her. Apparently, it was his staple and for awhile it was Viktoriya's staple. Viktoriya wasn't used to Del Taco or Burger King or Mikky D's. It wreaked havoc on her health. So she slowly searched out foods that were raw, or organic and she used her nutritional training to heal herself from her many health problems that developed. She lost her weight and started dancing.

Three Men In My Life

2009-05-30T09:58:00.007-06:00

My blogging has gone way down, as I thought it might, since I started another venture--work--and the novelty wore off. My husband calls me a fickle woman at times. I don't think it to be true in most things, but yes, in some things I can lose interest pretty quickly. Don't get me wrong! I think blogging is great, especially if you need something to keep you updating in the journal department. I kept a journal faithfully through my young adult life, starting with a diary in HS, which I still have and I look back at it and think OMGoodness, was I really that naiive, shallow, wise, faithful, etc. when I was just 16 - 18? Now the journaling has tapered off to nothing and so an occasional blog entry can somewhat fulfill that aspect of life, although I don't think blogging totally replaces journaling. Because a journal is private, your deeper feelings can be recorded. For me, blogging is kind of superficial and transparent---but fun.

Well, my sister and her husband have left for Paris. They will be there for around 10 days. The last trip they took was to India I believe. They are quite the travelers. I, on the other hand, have been to Canada! I can't say that I feel like I'm missing out. For me, every day is an adventure and I love my life. If I'm a healthy person, I'm a happy person. But I did ask for some parisian chocolate. I'm not even sure Laura can do that because it's so restricted these days. But she's a sweetheart like that, and I know she'll bring me back at least a postcard. I know she'll be missing her two little boys, who are staying with her mom-in-law. Carter has just been weaned and Harrison is a very energetic 3-year-old. So I think she is ready to get away just a bit. I'd say that is getting away a bit, wouldn't you?

Eddie is still in his braces. At almost 21 having braces is a real hindrence. But as with any trial, it can be turned into a blessing and I think it will eventually be to his benefit. We went on a great hike for Mother's Day. It was nice to spend some time with him one on one. We are so busy these days and once in awhile it's nice.

Greg has started a blog and his is amazing. I need to get him to show me how to put on a playlist and how to put up wallpaper (I still haven't figured that out) and how to write and how to get helpful information so that other people will actually find it worth their time to follow. His blog is TheLemonHarangue.blogspot.com

Can I just say that I've enjoyed visiting with my Dad so much? I went over last night and found him sick with a really bad cough and a fever of 100. He hadn't eaten and I was glad that I had brought him some of our Sunday dinner. This is a man who deserves to be taken care of and loved for the rest of his life. He shouldn't be without a visitor for even one day. He has always given liberally to people and lived such a simple life himself. I don't know what I'd do without him. He is my hero. We've had our disagreements in the past, but I'm glad that I overcame my resentments and just forgave. Who hasn't had a few issues with their parents? It opened up so many horizons as to who he is and helped us to understand each other.

2009-04-15T21:36:00.003-06:00

I'll now post and pretend that I'm doing so after having been to this
beautiful scene instead of having been subjected to another day of ghastly weather. Seriously, when will this end? I couldn't even work my job today! We can't operate those hand-held computers in this stuff. But it was a good napping day, TV day, and Family History Day. As much as I've wanted more kids and whined, moaned and complained that it didn't look like more kids were in my future, today my nap was uninterrupted and blissfully peaceful.

Speaking of sleep, I now snore. Apparently, Greg couldn't sleep last night between the hours of 3 am and 5 am because I was raising the roof with my snoring. How terrible! I always felt like I would never be one of those ungainly women who had no apparent self-respect nor self-control in their sleep. Well, it's happened. All I can do is say, "Well, why don't you use ear plugs? I do!" I'm sure that this is just a lapse of......well, self respect and self-control and that soon, I'll be back to normal. I'm not coming down with a cold, that I'm aware of, I'm not overly exhausted, I'm not stressed out, so it's obviously just a lapse.

Depression Seminar Final Session

2009-03-26T12:10:00.008-06:00

Frontal Lobe - Medical Conditions

"The eyes are the window to the soul" and the frontal lobe, too! This picture was so striking to me that I had to include it and find a way to make it work in this set of notes. This boy makes me think of the two boys in 'The Kite Runner'. So thanks for the indulgence.

Medical Conditions
Many diseases of the body affect the mind. This is true of Hepatitis C,head injury, stroke, lupus, congestive heart failure, postpartum syndrome, pms, inadequately-treated thyroid, low or high adrenal gland output. So when looking for the 4 hits of depression, always make sure that you do not have a chronic, untreated physical problem before ruling out the Medical Condition hit. Although having a medical condition would certainly increase the chances of depression, 85% of people with major depression do not have any of the above causes.

Frontal Lobe
Research done in the 90's and 2000's show that the main characteristics of depression are found in the frontal lobe of the brain. A depressed person shows a definite decrease in frontal lobe blood flow and activity. An easy way to show frontal lobe activity is through a PET Scan, which shows frontal lobe activity. As with different areas of the brain,the Frontal Lobe has specific functions. The seat of spirituality, morality and the will are found in this area. Compared to animals, humans have a comparatively large area for the frontal lobe. For instance, cats frontal lobe area is only 3.5% of the total brain. Dogs are 7%, chimpanzees have a 17% frontal lobe area, while humans have anywhere from 33 - 38% of the brain reserved for the frontal lobe.

When the frontal lobe is compromised by injury or impairment, the effects are myriad. Some of these are that moral principle is lower, there is a lack of foresight in decision-making, societal impairment is evident, abstract reasoning is impaired and there is a loss of empathy for other living things.

The Frontal Lobe is fed by carbohydrates. Fruits, nuts, grains and vegetables are sources that are good for the frontal lobe. Sugar has a hypoglycemic effect on the brain and large amounts of sugar has been shown to impair frontal lobe activity in grade school children. After taking in large amounts of sugar, it takes approximately 4 hours for the frontal lobe and brain to return back to normal, and a common practice is to eat more sugar before that has occurred because of the dip in blood sugar that happens. Therefore, many school-age children have an absence of critical abstract thinking.

It is known that the effects of hypnosis cancel out frontal lobe activity, making people highly suggestible. It is shown that hypnosis is achieved by having the subject stare at a bright flickering light. The constant changes of the light puts the person in a trancelike state. Something that is very hypnotic is entertainment television. It is very quick and scenes change in an instant, changing hundreds of times per minute. There are over 3,000 studies about TV and the mind. Studies show that 17 areas of the frontal lobe decline in the face of watching entertainment TV. Even news programs are doing the quick scene changes that make people glued to the TV.

Other things that adversely affect the Frontal Lobe - extremely hard rock, rap, hip-hop, alcohol, drugs, low carb diets, unmarried sexual activity, actual hypnosis, going against one's conscience, not praying or meditating or reading spiritual materials.

There are many examples in the scriptures where people have gone through depression, showing that good people have sadness. Elijah was depressed, Job was certainly not happy at one point, King David went through terrible depression, the whole book of Daniel talks about depression, and there are many examples of good people who were not spared of sorrow. Some of these people recovered when they changed something in their lives or stesses that were previously there went away. Whatever the case, we can learn from the scriptures.

Afterthought: I was so glad that I was able to attend this seminar. It made me place even more value on many of the teachings I've heard for all of my life. Many of them I took and did haphazardly in different periods of my life, when it was convenient or when I thought about it. I can see that these things (reading the scriptures, praying, meditating, eating good foods, avoiding harmful substances, not watching so much TV, going to bed early, getting up early, working hard, physical exercise, doing good to others, having positive thoughts, listening to good music and laughing!) are not only good teachings, they are essential to maintaining a joyful life. This was an excellent seminar with many truths that I will definitely implement with more intent in my life. It is amazing how much great truth is out there and the science now backs up what was taught to us forever...

Closed Doors

2009-03-25T17:15:00.037-06:00

Tomorrow I go to my U.S. census training. I will be one of thousands of government employees attempting to get an accurate count of the people living in the United States. I will be recording data on a hand held computer. I will learn something of what is behind closed doors, and I will put it in a permanent record. There is a story behind every door and I hope to be able to tell some of that story with my statistical data.

Just recently, information from the 1860 US Census helped to pinpoint where my great grandfather, Henry Breisach, lived and died. And this helped us to do important Family History work, piecing together clues that help connect us to centuries past. Someone like me had taken the time to find out who was living in the home and record it to the best of their ability.

I actually worked the 2000 US Census when I was living in American Fork. I had just moved to Utah and was getting used to the grid system, which did help me quite a bit, when I was smart enough to use it. Now I get to work here in the Provo area, which I am quite familiar with. I'm really looking forward to this. I love being outdoors and walking. I like figuring things out and I like meeting people. So, if you see me wandering around the streets of Provo, know that I'm probably on the clock, getting my exercise and getting paid.

I met one of my best friends doing the Census in 2000. Patti Jones was a student, like me, going to BYU for the post bacheloreate program in Special Ed. That didn't start for a few months later, however. I noticed her in the Census training session. A pretty, vivacious, blond woman who was always tallking on her cell. She would get and take at least 3-5 calls every session. She usually left to take care of the call. I thought, wow, how popular she must be. I didn't even think that she might have kids who needed her attention, which she did. (And, she is indeed extremely popular and fun!) At the time I was living in much different circumstances than I am now. Truthfully, I was very lonely, homesick and missing my own children terribly. Doing the Census was something to help me ease the pain I was feeling. We didn't speak at that time--I just took mental note.

A few months later, when the BYU Special Education Certification program was underway, I encountered her again. It was crazy and busy. This time we spoke and I found her to be so friendly and approachable. She wasn't so busy to not be interested in me and be my friend. I found out that she, like me, had been recently divorced and devastated by the whole thing. She was bravely going on with her life, taking care of her children and trying to certify in Special Ed so that she could keep her job at Timp View High, teaching the Emotional Support Unit, a class made of boys and occasionally girls who are in youth custody and working to be mainstreamed back into the regular classroom. These kids cannot be successful in regular classrooms or life until their behavior is under control. Patti is fabulous at what she does. She has a heart of gold and gives these kids so much empowerment to do what they need to do and be successful. I've been able to help her in her classroom now and again and I absolutely love it. She makes big deals out of birthdays, good behavior, special events and even ordinary events. Out-of-pocket is how it usually ends up. Budgets are not big by any means.

Here, again, we're talking about closed doors. These kids have seen some pretty rough times in their lives and doors have closed for them. Patti's class is pretty much the last stop before prison or institutionalization. I've seen the behavior---not good. I've seen unprovoked attacks, bad language, hostile attitudes, delinquent records, failed academics, removal from school, and so on.

The good news is that I've seen some miracles, too. I've seen some boys/girls take hold of themselves and realize that they need to act now, and turn their lives around. I've seen them take an active interest in learning because in reality, at this late stage in their schooling, no one else will take responsibility for their education. I've seen them make moral decisions that foster trust and their privileges increase from there.

When the day comes that someone actually graduates or is actually mainstreamed into regular classrooms, it is indeed a celebration. It means that there is an achievement or gold star by their name. Notes are taken, attention is paid and somewhere a door will open. And maybe, because of that one success, another and another door will open. And somewhere because of the actions of one caring person, the light is allowed through. Thanks Patti!

Depression Seminar Session 7

2009-03-18T13:03:00.013-06:00

Overcoming Loss And Life's Disappointments - "How Can You Mend A
Broken Heart?" -The Bee Gee's

It's hard to ever think that a broken heart will be mended. The pain is so intense, the memories don't seem to fade quickly enough. But in this session we learned some really great things about grief, what to expect and how to move on and be healthy afterwards. Warning: No one said it would be easy.

Take a look at what critical loss looks like--it doesn't just mean the death of a loved one. It could also be loss of a home, loss of a job, loss of a loved one by estrangement, divorce, loss of a body part (as in amputation) or even loss of social status.

With any one of these situations and any number of others, a grieving process is appropriate and expected. Some events may be more traumatic than others but all must be acknowledged in order to heal properly. Just as with physical wounds, the mind needs time to heal. If someone were to receive a physical wound, appropriate treatment is essential. If the treatment is inadequate or belated, complications arise and the risk of the wound not healing properly or even fatality occurring is greatly magnified. Some wounds are so severe that one never regains full physical function. I'm sad to say that just today, in the headlines, actress Natasha Richardson has died because of a brain injury that occurred from a seemingly minor skiing accident. I'm sure her family is wishing that they had taken every precaution and had not turned away paramedics. It's just one of those hard calls, but experts say that if she had gotten appropriate and timely care, her death could have been avoided. And so it is with mental or spiritual wounds. We need to seek and obtain the healing balm so that these can be healed once and for all and not leave painful residue.

There are ways we talk to ourselves and during the experience of loss we need to make sure we self-speak in healing ways and not like these distorted views--"I will never again be happy." "This kind of unfair thing always happens to me." "My world has ended because I lost him." Acknowledge the loss in ways like this--"I will miss the companionship that she has given me and I feel extreme loss." "I have lost a very important part of my life." "This is painful and it sucks." There are some subtle but important differences in the two groups of expressions of grief. Can you pick up on them? Good!

There are 3 Stages of Grief
1) Shock and Disbelief - This lasts for a few minutes up to a few days.
2) Developing Awareness - This lasts for 3 - 12 months. Symptoms are inability to concentrate, preoccupation - always going back to thinking about the event, anxiety, restlessness, sleeplessness, loss of appetite, digestive problems, fatigue, anger, guilt and depression is common. Although this stage can be longer in duration, the grieving individual should feel increasingly better month by month.

3) Resolution - Anywhere from 3 - 12 months after loss. This is when you gradually take charge of your loss and resolve to live your life despite of the loss.

We were referred to a study of a group of 40 men who had experienced a death of a spouse and whose immune systems were already compromised before the loss. They were asked to reflect on the meaning of the loss. The groups divided naturally into 3 categories. Group 1 only emphasized the negative aspects of the loss. Group 2 accepted the fact of the loss and just moved on with their lives. Group 3 found a new respect for life and made new commitments to improve their own lives. It was found, upon examination, that both Groups 1 and 2 experienced a decline in their immune systems and overall health while Group 3 showed both an improved immune system and long-term survival rate. So from this we can infer that there are healthier and worse ways to go through loss.

Healthy grieving does not come naturally to most people. So one can almost view it as a series of tasks to go through when progressing through the stages of grieving. What experts have found is that indeed, time does not always heal wounds. But working through them over time can.

The Tasks of Mourning

1. Accept the reality of the loss - We do this by having funerals, memorials and talking about the person and reminiscing about them.

2. Work through the Pain - Don't avoid the pain. Acknowledge the hurt and loss and then make sure that you take care of yourself. For 15 minutes a day for about 4 or 5 days, write about the loss and what you are experiencing, feeling and remembering. Get rest, sunlight, proper nutrition, and plenty of social support. It has been shown that poor social support is more closely related to depression than torture during wartime. Maintain spiritual ties to develop patience in suffering. Cling to hopeful beliefs and faith and know that loss was never meant to be.

3. Identify the functions that the loss provided and try to replace them or adjust to them.

4. Emotionally Relocate the Loss - Put the loss to rest in your mind. Put it away and know that it will never that same space again but it can be relocated. For example, Grandma's not here anymore, but she now is in heaven and is happy and I'm happy for her.

5. Reflect and Grow from the loss. Think about what may have been learned from that hard
experience and how it has changed you for the better. Romans 8:28. Discuss with someone ways to grow from the loss. Remember that sharing with someone is good. "Don't go into your mind alone, it is a dangerous place," especially during the grieving process.

Grief is always complicated by severe Depression. In addition to the above symptoms the severely depressed person feels worthlessness, has greatly impaired functioning, and goes beyond 18 months bereavement.

If you are not now experiencing a loss, why not help someone through who is experiencing a loss? Share your love with them and help them to find their way. It will come back to you when you need it!

Depression Seminar Session 6

2009-03-18T09:07:00.009-06:00

Coping With Stress

"Stress is the trash of modern life - we all generate it but if you don't dispose of it properly, it will pile up and overtake your life." Gnarly Karly

Stress in life is inevitable--it's what 21st Century people live with. It is so ironic that we, with all the conveniences and the technology so readily available, and the wealth flowing, that stress has never been higher in any other century. It is in epidemic proportion. It contributes and speeds up most all of the major illnesses, including depression. So to be able to cope with stress is tantamount to our survival in society.

One-half of depression patients are unable to cope with stress, thus making it one of the four hits qualifying for the development of major depression. (Congratulations, you have the necessary number of hits, making you a qualifier for major misery!) So how does one cope with stress? It helps to understand a little bit more about the brain.

The Pineal gland is in the brain. It is only the size of a kernel of corn, yet it controls so much. It produces a chemical called epithalamin, which catalyzes a process that slows down the aging process, and even increases lifespan. It works with other chemicals in our bodies to create this effect. The end product produced is melatonin, a hormone that peaks during nighttime hours. It is sometimes called "the hormone of darkness". Melatonin protects against free-radical damage, enhances the immune system, assists in coping with stress, increases the ability to experience pleasure, regulates cholesterol, blood pressure, heart rhythm, and decreases risk for osteoporosis, among many other things. Melatonin levels fall as a person ages but one can maintain melatonin levels by enhancing pineal gland health.

Some things that cut melatonin production significantly are going to bed late, and exposure to blue light and/or regular light after 10 pm. We were referred to a study done at BYU, where students' GPA's were evaluated on individual sleep habits. It was shown that those students who were able to get to bed at around 10 pm had better GPA's than those who did not. Also Dr. Nedley cited his own experience during medical school where classes alone were from 6 am - 6 pm, not including homework, etc. His solution was to be in bed by 9 pm and up at 4 am. The only time he studied were the hours in the morning before class. He did this throughout his medical college years and he ended up with a 4.0 GPA. He attributes his success to his sleep habits.

One can supplement with melatonin and results have been good with short-term use and lower dosage (.3 mgs vs 3 mgs)but studies have not been conclusive about the long-term effects of melatonin supplementation. There are foods that are sources of melatonin among which are: corn, rice, barley, tomatoes, banana, ginger and the highest source - oats.

Lifestyle can also reduce melatonin levels:

Not coping with stress
caffeine (cuts melatonin production by 1/2)
alcohol (cuts melatonin production by up to 41%)
tobacco
aspirin-like drugs
beta and calcium channel blockers
anti-anxiety drugs and sleep aids
vitamin B-12 (3 mg and above/day)
anti-depressants

Having said that not coping with stress is a bad thing, there are some forms of stress, if managed, that can actually be OK. First we need to define the different types of stress. Passive stress is the kind of stress that we feel when we are watching something horrific or terrible happening. For instance watching a scary movie puts us in great stress and turmoil and that would be characterized as passive stress. Active stress is the job deadline, the challenge of taking care of your kids, work demands. We were referred to a study in which subjects were exposed to either 12 minutes of watching gruesome surgical procedures or 12 minutes of a challenging test, and afterwards receiving a saliva test. The immune levels of those who took the test actually increased and the immune levels of those who watched the surgical procedures decreased. It all had to do with the kind of stress the subjects were exposed to. Passive stress depletes the bodies reserves. So the good news is that most acute stressors will boost the immune system. It is only when the stress is unusually prolonged or repetitive and passively endured that stress is detrimental. And again, the best thing to deal with all of it is melatonin.

Ways to Increase Melatonin Production:

Increase natural light and decrease artificial light where possible
sleep in complete darkness
eat foods rich in melatonin
avoid calcium deficiency - calcium plays a role in the production of melatonin
fast once a month for 24 hours. Fasting increases the production of melatonin, especially during the evening hours.

You can also learn to turn harmful passive stress to active stress. First, list the top 10 stressors currently in your life. Try to implement healthy adaptation by finding a way to either limit, avoid or remove the stressor. If that isn't possible, don't ignore it or use escapism. It won't go away and by ignoring it or trying to temporarily escape it may make things even worse.

As always, it is so important to implement a healthy lifestyle. Have an exercise program, get plenty of hydration, sun, fresh air, rest, moderation in all things, and trust in God. Do the things that are so often recommended for us to do, as Christians and LDS people. Do good deeds - it helps us forget ourselves and our pain. Put planning and organization into your life, then don't get hung up on it and let things work themselves out, putting faith in God. Dwell on the good and positive. Practice some form of restorative meditation, prayer being the very best. Finally know that you can cope, that God has given you ability and tools to cope. Trust in God.

"The only time to be anxious is when we are anxiously engaged in good works"

And finally, when the World Trade Center bombings took place, there was a tremendous amount of stress experienced by the survivors. Public figures such as David Letterman, movie stars and sports figures stated that in the grand scheme of things, what they do for a living to influence the public is so trivial and many sports and entertainment events were cancelled during this time. If the very people who facilitate these things are saying this, should we not believe it and limit our time on trivial things?

The more time we spend on helping ourselves and others by implementing wholesome lifestyles and contributing to the good of society, the more prepared we will be when life throws a curve ball at us and we're down for the count. We will have our reserves built up and so if we can't do everything, we know that the preparation we have done in advance has been our salvation.